Arkashean Q&A Session -- 013 (continues session 012)

GERRIE: I can change, can't I?

THERRY: Yes. Depending on the freedoms, or lack of them.

GERRIE: So how would I know right now if I have the freedom to change, and be guaranteed to find another job?

THERRY: There's no such thing as guarantees.

GERRIE: Well, do I have the freedom?

THERRY: Trial and error will tell you that.

GERRIE: If I go and see my parents, how much of Arkashea should I tell them? About Arkashea?

THERRY: Understand the law of casting pearls before swines. If you already know that there's no way they're going to change, and if you already know that what you're getting into is going to cause harm to them, why get into it? Why not let them live their lives, and you live yours. Leave it alone.

GERRIE: So, I don't even have to go see them and talking about Arkashes. Okay, sometimes I feel it might be terrible, but I don't miss them.

THERRY: So what?

GERRIE: So, okay.

THERRY: That's not part of the discussion either.

GERRIE: Okay, I just changed it. (laughter) I just changed it because I thought, well, you know, if someone who cares about their parents can go and see them, then I--

THERRY: Yea, that's not necessary; you can honor your father and your mother without having to see them all the time. You can honor them without being their slaves, you know?

GERRIE: Well, I've gotten out of being a slave for Mom.

THERRY: Well, not entirely.

GERRIE: Really? I'm still influenced? But I just feel--

THERRY: `Cause if you had gotten out of it, she wouldn't still have such an emotional influence over you.

GERRIE: She don't call me anymore; she used to call me every Saturday. She stopped.

THERRY: Uh-huh.

GERRIE: Two weeks ago. She has this thing, I guess, that I disappointed her.

THERRY: Big deal. You didn't come here to live her life; you came here to live yours. She's here to live her own. She doesn't have the right to expect you to live her life.

GERRIE: Well, will one day I be able to learn the same things that Tim or Wayne are learning?

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: I just want to know how long this process takes.

THERRY: Forever.

GERRIE: If, since you said I was going to be a carpenter in my next lifetime, wouldn't I--

THERRY: I didn't say that that was going to happen.

GERRIE: Well, you, yea, you did!

THERRY: Did not.

GERRIE: Wayne was there.

THERRY: I never tell people what they're going to be. I don't tell people their futures.

GERRIE: Not this future; next future, next lifetime.

THERRY: It's still future, and it's still yours. I just never do those things. I never tell people what they're going to do.

GERRIE: So, it wouldn't have slipped.

THERRY: I don't slip. It's quite possible within a discussion, I may have said, who knows? Maybe you'll be a carpenter in the next life? That doesn't mean you're going to be a carpenter in the next life.

GERRIE: So, really it doesn't even help if you start out on this lifetime to get ahead.

THERRY: Correct. The only thing that's going to be kept is wisdom.

GERRIE: What happened to all my wisdom?

THERRY: Well, people play stupid games sometimes and they shield it from themselves.

GERRIE: In order to entertain the society they're in?

THERRY: Whatever. Or to entertain themselves. Just because you are what you are now, that doesn't mean you'll always be what you are. Same thing with wisdom. It all depends on the limits of the game.

GERRIE: What does the crystal ball represent?

THERRY: Many things.

GERRIE: Okay, so basically the symbols--

THERRY: Let's not get into Symbology. You have enough problems dealing with reality.

GERRIE: So, if I become more realistic to the mundane world, then I'll be okay?

THERRY: It will help you. It'll prepare you to give you a firmer foundation so that you can deal with levels of Symbology.

GERRIE: I just sometimes don't like being an earthling; a human being.

THERRY: Tough shit.

GERRIE: So, I'm going to be here for a long time.

THERRY: Forever.

GERRIE: Now once I take care of this reality, will I be able to ah, to, for example, have the process of doing Bi-location so I could go to other libraries and study?

THERRY: It's possible.

GERRIE: Cause that's what I want to do. I feel--

THERRY: Obviously you need to learn patience.

GERRIE: It's there somewhere; it's hidden.

THERRY: That doesn't change the fact that you need to learn patience. You have to understand that you cannot storm the gates of Heaven. There is no credit; you get only what it is that you've earned. You have to pay your dues.

Q&A1165
GERRIE:
My growth process--is it strictly based on my thought process?

THERRY: Yes. Your shoulds versus your wants within a given limitations of your Predestiny. Predestiny determines the matrix within which your freedoms will allow reality.

GERRIE: Right now I'm ruled more by Predestiny than free-will, right?

THERRY: Everybody is, to a point. For instance, Predestiny now says you're a lady, at least you're a woman gender. And everything that goes along with being a woman is limited. Rather if that's good or if that's bad that's beside the point. But that gives you the matrix within which you have to grow. Your second level of Predestiny is you're from Panama, and you have a certain history as being from Panama; that is limiting. You have to learn to deal with that. Then the next level of limitations is you're from a specific set of parents which have very specific ideas, very specific rights and wrongs, goods and bads, you have to deal with that. And so on, it keeps going; those are all the matrix within Predestiny.

GERRIE: When you told me that I was still influenced by religion, I don't remember my religion when I was a kid.

THERRY: That doesn't change the fact that you are still influenced by it.

GERRIE: Which aspect?

THERRY: All of it. That's what you use to determine your concept of right and your concept of wrong.

GERRIE: But we went to different religions, different church.

THERRY: So what?

GERRIE: You mean religion as a whole then.

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: Okay, you're not being specific then.

THERRY: Correct. I'm never specific; it's a pattern.

GERRIE: Religion is religion.

THERRY: Correct.

GERRIE: When conflicts arise between people, is it in the situation between Kay and I, how would I know the cause? In her case I don't even interact with her.

THERRY: Well, obviously you need to be able to evaluate the specifics of the situation.

GERRIE: Some people are just going to be--you can't make everybody happy.

THERRY: Correct. Right now I say give yourself a little more time so you can learn more of the laws of creation. They, in turn, will teach you the patterns of creation.

GERRIE: So, well, how many more books will I still have to read?

THERRY: Does it matter?

GERRIE: Um-um. Well the more I read, the more laws I have access to that could be--

THERRY: There's one book that you'll never finish reading.

GERRIE: Which one is that one?

THERRY: The book of life.

GERRIE: Oh please. So, you're actually saying that I have a book of life that just keeps--it contains all reincarnations?

THERRY: It contains you.

GERRIE: Just for this lifetime.

THERRY: Does it matter? I don't remember saying other lives. All I said was there is a book that you'll never stop reading. All of the other stuff you're bringing into it; not me. A little bit of assumptions there?

GERRIE: The way you're talking, I'll be walking not talking, not even making, thinking--

THERRY: All I'm saying is you will play the games that you choose to play.

GERRIE: Won't even think. Well, like, think less on situations. You know, you tend to have a situation and you make a lot of assumptions, whether it's a scenario that you're involved, or whether it's a scenario that somebody else is involved.

THERRY: Isn't that individualistic?

GERRIE: To make assumptions and thoughts?

THERRY: Yea, to play whatever game you want to play. Doesn't that serve a purpose that you're serving?

GERRIE: Where's my excessive ego if, ah, right now on the continuum?

THERRY: I never give those things.

GERRIE: Oh, you don't?

THERRY: No. The only answer that I can give you that would be of value to you is it is wherever it is.

GERRIE: So it's not balanced? It's not moderate?

THERRY: What is balanced? What is moderate? Give me definitions to those words as it applies to an individual's excessive ego. Seems to me the only response that you could get that is valuable is to the degree that they interfere with your growth, to that degree is it non-appropriate. To the degree that it helps you grow and become more positive without harming others, to that degree it's--

GERRIE: Well, how do you measure growth, like within myself, would that be the contentment within the individual, is that how you measure growth?

THERRY: I never measure it. I think it's a useless task to measure something. Either it applies to the situation at hand, or it doesn't. If it applies, you use it, if it doesn't, you leave it alone. Not everything needs to be pigeonholed. Just because something applies once, that doesn't mean it will always apply. And, if it does apply, it doesn't mean it'll apply according to the same degree within the same circumstances that it applied before. It's a sliding scale.

GERRIE: So, that's why you should never judge yourself because you really don't know what's going on.

THERRY: Exactly.

GERRIE: We're just--I mean, I feel like we're just puppets here.

THERRY: Exactly. You're just marionettes that are being pulled by the strings of freedom and Predestiny.

GERRIE: But after so many lifetimes, don't you get enough common sense where you be able to figure out--

THERRY: One would hope so.

GERRIE: Oh. So, I know what you're going to say, just because you have a brain doesn't mean you're going to use it.

THERRY: That is correct.

GERRIE: Wouldn't our brain--ah--right now, don't we use five percent? I thought that within each lifetime we can increase the percentage of our brain like ten percent, fifteen percent.

THERRY: One would hope so.

GERRIE: So that's based on the individual then.

THERRY: You got it.

GERRIE: Maybe I'll do brain surgery. (laughter)

THERRY: Okay.

GERRIE: Now, these people that have had these brain surgeries where they're able to open the third eye, can that be--

THERRY: No, it doesn't work that way.

GERRIE: Well, they're able to expand their awareness.

THERRY: Hey, you don't need brain surgery to expand your awareness. There is a mechanism whereby you automatically have expanded awareness. It's called growth. Each time you grow, you're expanded. And that's the only way.

GERRIE: How will you know it? Will you know it through your dreams, like--

THERRY: Does it matter how, so long as you know?

GERRIE: But like, at this point right now, what purpose do my dreams have? I mean for people in general, too?

THERRY: They're tools.

GERRIE: Which are used at that level which has nothing to do with this level?

THERRY: They're still tools. Doesn't matter what level they're served on.

GERRIE: You mean, you can't follow your dreams, though.

THERRY: Aren't you making an assumption there?

GERRIE: Well I did and it didn't work for me. (laughter)

THERRY: Does that mean it's the same for everybody?

GERRIE: No.

THERRY: Or does it simply mean you shouldn't assume; instead you should learn.

GERRIE: I didn't learn from that one.

THERRY: Perhaps because you're trying to be your own teacher. How can you teach yourself something you don't know?

GERRIE: I thought dreams would give you certain guidelines as to--

THERRY: I guess you thought wrong.

GERRIE:--destiny.

THERRY: I guess you thought wrong. What is the nature of proof? And how much are you going to believe?

GERRIE: Well, that's based on your language.

THERRY: Bingo.

GERRIE: So, I just feel like, I mean, I'm talking to you and I feel like it's all just common sense.

THERRY: Common sense is not so common many times. Okay?

GERRIE: Okay. Therry, how do I explain you to others that I talk to. When they ask questions I just respond by saying what you taught me... and, when they ask me how I learned all this stuff, all I can do is try to draw pictures for them?

THERRY: Why draw pictures? Why not simply say that, as you said, there's a friend who's been able to help me understand things, and just leave it at that.

GERRIE: But is that okay? That's not a betrayal?

THERRY: No.

GERRIE: And it's not blasphemy?

THERRY: No, there's no need to tell these people that I'm a psychic in the Monastery.

GERRIE: Because last year I used the word Guru, and teacher a lot, but I realized today when I was talking to Wayne, and a little bit even before I told him this, that people, when I use that word, paint their own picture, according to their own reference points, and it's not accurate, and it--

THERRY: Well, you just made a presumption.

GERRIE: Okay, you're right. A lot of times it's not accurate. A lot of times people automatically think of a Jim Jones type guy.

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: Um, and, at the same time it generally comes up something about you in my life, so this time that's what I chose to handle it as.

THERRY: That's fine.

GERRIE: So you said that's fine, okay. Um, and her thing is, she says that she feels haunted by an ability to have premonitions, um--

THERRY: She has about four harpies.

GERRIE: Okay.

THERRY: One of them is quite nasty.

GERRIE: Okay, well, can you say anything more about it, or--

THERRY: No, they belong to her.

GERRIE: Okay.

THERRY: Anyway, continue your questions.

GERRIE: Alright, well, the question was, she doesn't know how to tell what things are her own thoughts, and what things are premonitions.

THERRY: Perhaps the best beginning for her is to learn the laws of reality.

GERRIE: Yea, well--

THERRY: For her to understand the nature of reality, itself, and its mutinous levels.

GERRIE: And how does she do that when she's got two kids and a husband?

THERRY: Two kids and a husband does not make a prison for her mind.

GERRIE: That's true.

THERRY: And in that time, she can read, she has time for that, plus she can talk to you, `cause you have a fairly good understanding of reality now, you're not a master at it, but, hey, who is?

GERRIE: You are.

THERRY: That's beside the point. Just because I know ninety-nine percent of the laws of reality, that doesn't make me a master. At any rate--

GERRIE: What can she read? I mean, we don't have any of our books published, and that's what I would love to give her. Is there anything else she could read that might give her any--

THERRY: Well, in the beginning, you can do a lot of talking verbally, plus she can always write down a list a questions which we'll be glad to respond to.

GERRIE: That's true. I told her I'd send her more information. So I'm not quite sure, um, I mean should I write all that stuff down in a letter and tell her these are the things you can do?

THERRY: Again now, you're asking me what you should do; you know I won't answer to those things--

GERRIE: Okay, well--

THERRY: You already know that I refuse to tell you what to do with your life. I can simply respond to specific questions in terms of patterns of creation, but beyond that I won't go.

GERRIE: Okay, well, I told her that I'd get back to her, and I'd send her something.

THERRY: Okay.

GERRIE: Um, so I guess I could write a letter? I mean I don't want to pass myself off as gee, you can talk to me, and I know this stuff, I mean, how do I put that?

THERRY: Well, there are a number of possibilities. What you spoke of is one of them, without actually saying it. You could easily, simply respond to the question, without saying that see how smart I am.

GERRIE: Well, that's a good idea. I guess if you give me the information to answer, I could answer, I mean, if you would do that?

THERRY: Plus, within that same sphere of influence, I would demand that you do your own thinking.

GERRIE: Well I had intended to write her a letter-- But, except, see I remember the letter we wrote to my Mom's friend a while ago, and she never responded back to us, so I guess she had her own reasons for doing that. But her question was very specific, and she already asked the question, and I told her that I would get back to her with more information.

THERRY: Which is fine. So ask the question, already.

GERRIE: So, okay, so the question is how does she tell which are premonitions, and which are her thoughts?

THERRY: Okay, first of all, one of her harpies is driving her towards a specific sect type of religion. She has to override that without negativity. Secondly, another of her harpies, the nasty one, has her inside a war. That war has to be put to rest. She has to come to understand that it is necessary to have both, the he and the she in equal balance, where one is no more important than the other before she can learn to enter our world. Next, she'll have to learn a new language; the language of specific terms whereby she does not attribute them to any specific religion, but simply a concept of language. The way the word chair, or the couch, they mean very specific concepts, and you don't attribute those concepts to any specific religious or philosophical thought; she has to have that ability. That ability will give her the ability to accept knowledge from all sources without prejudices, and without preferences. That will allow her to investigate and find what is appropriate for her; with the understanding, of course, that as she gains more knowledge, her pseudo-Maat will consistently change. And that changes should not be judged as neither good nor bad, simply the recognition that as you gain more information, what is the center called you, or her, in this case, will evolve. Then she has to get into understanding the laws of creation; not religious; none of that religious bullshit, but the laws of creation. We don't care which God did it, we only care about how it was done. So the best way is to look at it from an evolvement point of view rather than a fictitious power force such as a god who comes down and decreed it to occur. You can throw the nip out; look at it from evolvement point of view. Once she achieves those, then she'll be ready, but not before. Right at the moment she's seeking, but she's too colored; her thinking is prejudiced, even though it's troubled.

GERRIE: She says that she has dreams and that in the next few weeks they come true.

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: And that, um, she's scared of them.

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: And that she doesn't think that now that she has a family, that she could even deal with this very well.

THERRY: She won't have much choice.

GERRIE: Doesn't sound like she has much choice; she'd like it to leave her alone.

THERRY: It won't.

GERRIE: And also, her biggest fear was that she kept thinking, well, three different times she thought about her son dying. He's four, that, and she kept thinking that he wasn't going to live to an early age.

THERRY: He's not.

GERRIE: I mean an older age, or an old age.

THERRY: He's going to die young.

GERRIE: That's what she thought.

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: Um--

THERRY: He might not live beyond sixteen. A few choices have to come into play, but according to whatever, I'll be surprised if he lives beyond sixteen.

GERRIE: Hum.

THERRY: How old is he now?

GERRIE: Four.

THERRY: Four, yea.

GERRIE: Why?

THERRY: Well, that belongs to him.

GERRIE: Hum, the thing is that he, every time she's thought it, she's thought it three times, well, she doesn't know if she thought it, or if she's perceiving a perception--

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: A premonition, and so that's what's got her worried because she thought this three different times, and each time she thought it, the kid picked it up--

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: And the kid like stopped playing because he was like in the middle doing something totally different and he asked her how long he would live, and then another time, the second time, he said he was going to die young, and then the third time he asked her how old she would, she thought he would be when he died, and, um, she got freaked out all three times, but the last time she said that most people, you know, lived to old age and that she thought he would too, but that no one can really ever tell how old they'll live.

THERRY: There's only one chance that he will go beyond that. There's only one opportunity.

GERRIE: Can you say any more about that?

THERRY: Well it really belongs to her.

GERRIE: Hum, okay.

THERRY: But I don't think she's going to like what she would have to do. `Cause she may have to--I can't say anymore.

GERRIE: Okay, I can accept that.

THERRY: See, the big problem would be the belief system of her husband.

GERRIE: Yea, he's Baptist, and, uh, I don't know, I don't think he practices anything, but he's definitely got a real strong belief system.

THERRY: Yea. And, just between you and me, well, that's stupid to say that, especially if the tape's on, so I won't say it.

GERRIE: You can turn the tape off.

THERRY: Okay. (tape shut off)

GERRIE: Can you turn that off for one more minute?

THERRY: Okay.

GERRIE: Um--

THERRY: It's nice to know that the power's still accurate.

GERRIE: Um, that's interesting. So the last time, that's what she told him, so now the little kid goes around saying he's going to live to at least a hundred.

THERRY: That's good. It's good because it will give the child an emotional security.

GERRIE: But, um, you know, because she had so much fear around that, she didn't know whether to trust it as premonition or not, and I had a hard time helping her, I mean, uh, I don't know. She said sometimes she can tell, and sometimes she can't.

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: And, uh, I said that that is a hard one, because especially when you're dealing with yourself, you can very much make things a self-fulfilling prophecy if you believe `um.

THERRY: That's true.

GERRIE: Um, I did tell her the law Illusions are the Driving Force for Reality. Um, I was trying to explain it, and I couldn't explain it well enough without telling her the law, so I told her the law. Um and I was describing how, you know, how we form our own reality through our thoughts, so that thoughts are definitely powerful, but that just because we think them doesn't mean that they happen. I mean that's also true, right? They're on their own level, and they're evaluated on their own level unless we choose to bring them into the physical by our behavior, right?

THERRY: Yea, it has to be a pairing before reality comes into it.

GERRIE: So that's what I told her. Because I was describing how people make illusions and how people also fight their illusions. I was using a Kung-Fu episode, as, you know, I was telling her about this one I saw where Cane made all his illusions appear before him and all his harpies and all his fears because of what he thought, but that didn't mean that they were premonitions either; they were thoughts which was different.

THERRY: Yea, but don't forget the other side of that reality. What you spoke of is valid, but that's only one side of the duality.

GERRIE: Which is the other side? That thoughts are the basis of reality?

THERRY: No, the other half of it is, while one side says it doesn't necessarily mean that it is, the other side says, it is.

GERRIE: How so?

THERRY: Remember, the first of all the great dualities is the presence and the absence, so if you have a target thought that says just because you have a thought that doesn't make that thought real, that's the absence of it. The presence of it would say, if you have a thought, it will become real.

GERRIE: Hum, well then, how do you, how do you deal in reality then, with that? Which one do you follow?

THERRY: Well, when you're on the level that you have those psychic belts and they're active, then you need to learn the laws of your illusion much more so because there's a whole lot of other forces involved.

GERRIE: But she couldn't make it happen by thinking it, could she?

THERRY: No.

GERRIE: See, that's what she was afraid of; she seemed to have the picture in her mind of like a three year old with magical thinking, I think it therefore it happens.

THERRY: Well in some instances that is possible.

GERRIE: Well, I figured, see that's why I didn't know how much to tell her because I know that that's possible; that's what magic is based on, and that's what travel on other levels is based on.

THERRY: That is correct. But just because you think it, that doesn't automatically mean that it will exist, because you have to take into account the pairing.

GERRIE: You have to pair it with the work to get it here into reality, don't you?

THERRY: Well, there's a number of pairings that take place, but nonetheless once the pairing is there, then yes, it will happen.

GERRIE: What's the other pairings?

THERRY: Well, I really don't want to give you too much about the pairings because I don't think you can handle them properly, and I don't trust you with them.

GERRIE: Okay. I trust you to protect me. I'm not going to question your judgment. I have enough trouble with whether I should eat soup that has little bits of pork in it, or wear earrings or not. (laughter) Um, okay, so the part that you said was for her I can write it as you said it on the tape in the letter?

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: The one, two, three, and four?

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: Okay, then I'll do that. I'll just tell her I asked my friend and this is what he said, and she can take it for what she wants to take it for. I won't tell her about her child.

THERRY: As a matter of fact, it's a good opportunity that you can frighten her away. That part of tape that was for her, record it and send it to her. That way you don't have to write it.

GERRIE: I can do that. You think that would be better?

THERRY: You have to decide that for yourself.

GERRIE: And should I send her any of the part about her son? About the part that that is accurate? The part I told you about her having those conversations with him?

THERRY: You have to decide that for yourself. I can't tell you how to live your life. You know that I have always refused to tell you how to live your life. I see no reason to begin now.

GERRIE: Well, could you comment on my decision about it?

THERRY: Wouldn't that have the same effect?

GERRIE: Yea, I guess it's true. Well, I'm not going to send her that part. I think that was another question. So, if it's wrong, I guess I'll find out in time, `cause I don't see a need to necessarily worry her.

THERRY: See the problem comes in that she has entered my world. Not in this life, per se, but in past life.

GERRIE: I could tell that by the accuracy of the things she said she saw, and how they came about.

THERRY: And as a result of that, she doesn't belong to herself anymore. She's trying to exercise a certain amount of free-will to satisfy what she views as her own needs, but on a psychic level, she doesn't have that right. So, therefore, until she comes to know the laws of the illusion that she's under, she's going to have problems with her abilities. And if some unscrupulous person should begin to influence her such that she uses the abilities improperly, she's going to have a lot of problems.

GERRIE: She says that she wishes she could understand them so that she could use them as a gift to help people.

THERRY: She could do that.

GERRIE: And then she told me about this lady that the police use all the time when weird things are going on and she sees them, and that was the example she gave me was something like that.

THERRY: Yea, she has a better use for them.

GERRIE: I figured she probably did.

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: She also gave me a picture that cued me in to probably what she was like some life when she had them, because she said that she pictured that she couldn't use them while she has kids and a husband, and I'm not sure why she said that, but she said that she could only use them up in a mountain somewhere. She could picture herself as like some old woman, as like a hermit or something using these abilities. And I, I don't know if this is true, but I cued into the fact that that was probably some life when she had them and when she used them.

THERRY: What she's talking about is she doesn't belong in the outside world.

GERRIE: Hmm, well, that's pretty funny, because her whole life, all she wanted to do was get married and have kids.

THERRY: Yea, that's why she left the Monastery for.

GERRIE: Our Monastery?

THERRY: I'm sorry, that belongs to her.

GERRIE: Well, she's, it's funny, because she got married pretty late, I mean, she always seemed pretty sad, and I really never thought she'd get married, and I felt sorry for her `cause I knew she wanted it so much, and I thought she'd be a pretty good mom, and she is a pretty good mom, but, boy, is she devoted. I mean, she's so devoted to those kids that it might not be so good for `em. Or, I don't know, maybe it'll be great for `em, but they sure are, I mean you talk about their needs being met, she's there for them every single second. The interesting thing is her husband's not. He's um, he hardly helps her, in my opinion, at all. I mean he does work hard; he's a lawyer, he works like twelve to sixteen hours a day, and, but--

THERRY: That's not the important part. If he's not there, it's not because he doesn't want to be; remember, he too, has his fears.

GERRIE: Yea, yea that's true.

THERRY: So you can't judge him harshly.

GERRIE: When he's there he's really nice to the kids, but he's not there a lot, and when he is there he definitely, I mean, she takes care of him. He's like a third kid. I mean, she was really sick, and he didn't give her all that much help. He gave her help when we were all around observing their relationship, but otherwise, if either of them got to sleep, because they have this new baby, it's him that sleeps; not her, and she the one that gets up and makes all the meals for him as well as for the kids, and she's the one that does all that kind of stuff all the time for all three of them.

THERRY: Yea.

GERRIE: Which I didn't think was such a thrill. I figured, God, if I was going to have a kid, and wanted one so bad, I may as well have a baby and have only it to deal with, then have it and an adult to take care of at the same time.

THERRY: Don't look now, but your prejudice is showing.

GERRIE: Yea, that's true. I didn't think he was very supportive.

THERRY: I think you're being rather insensitive right now.

GERRIE: That may be true.

THERRY: Aren't you forgetting that it is their game, not yours?

GERRIE: Yea, that part's true.

THERRY: Aren't you also forgetting that given the laws of their respective illusions, each can do no more then what those laws will allow them?

GERRIE: Yea, that's true.

THERRY: So therefore, why become angry at somebody because they have a headache?

GERRIE: Yea, I guess that's true too.

THERRY: From where I understand, rather than be somewhat down on him, you should praise him because he is making whatever efforts his laws will allow to change the situation so that the pattern can be broken.

GERRIE: That part's true. As far as how he treats his kids, it definitely is.

THERRY: Not necessarily because of how he treats the children, but how he treats himself.

GERRIE: Yea, that part's true too. He probably has a lot of problems from that kind of a childhood. Oh, I know he does; he told me something about their marriage last time I was there which appears to be going better, but for a while it looked like it was pretty much over.

THERRY: Yea. The old patterns were too strong.

GERRIE: Now it seems better.

THERRY: Not really.

GERRIE: No, huh. Well, that's too bad.

THERRY: He's due to have a crisis in his psychology. Depending on how he handles it, and the duration of it, that will determine what happens with them.

GERRIE: If someone lives in a monastery, and takes vows, oh I guess it depends on how long they take their vows for. I was going to ask if the vows--if then you had to take them for eternity, but I guess it depends, right?

THERRY: Doesn't everything depend? Remember the nature of the continuum?

GERRIE: Which aspect? You mean just that it's a continuum, like a little change--

THERRY: Right, with all the respective levels. Vows are a continuum too. So time. Obviously if you make a vow, that you're going to learn to type, well, that vow is in effect until you've learned to type, which could be six months, two weeks; could be four life-times. But nonetheless, that vow is in effect only until you have already learned to type. Once you have achieved, that vow is no longer valid. But if you've made a vow to become Superman, well, you've got a longer wait.

GERRIE: I've never wanted to make a vow to a Monastery because I always thought that you'd have to make it life after life after life to the monastery.

THERRY: I think your words, your thoughts, and your feelings do not match. Because I've picked up that your words are scattered, your thoughts have to do with the political nature of something, and your feelings has to do with the concept of spirituality.

GERRIE: I guess that's pretty accurate. I guess--

THERRY: With such diffuseness, how could you possibly come out with intelligence?

GERRIE: Well, I guess I was thinking about the physical Monastery with its political implications.

THERRY: Those were parts of the words.

GERRIE: Well, that's what I was aware of thinking, but I guess I--

THERRY: But your feelings weren't there.

GERRIE: Well I guess my feelings associate a monastery with spirituality.

THERRY: Then, in that case, Jim Jones must have been a pretty holy guy.

GERRIE: No.

THERRY: So, that shows a measure of inconsistency in your thoughts versus your belief system. Just because someone lives in a so-called place that's supposed to be sanctified, that doesn't mean the place, nor he, is.

GERRIE: That's true.

THERRY: And if one is trying to learn, one should have the three parts of them agree before they open their mouth.

GERRIE: I wasn't aware of not agreeing; you cheated. (laughter) But I'm glad you did, because it made me aware of something, but I didn't, I wasn't aware that it was different.

THERRY: Don't I always cheat?

GERRIE: I guess.

THERRY: How can I possibly not use the abilities that I have. I mean that's like me suddenly not knowing my own name. Why do you think I live in a monastery for? Because I can--there is never a time when I can shut the lights. The lights are always there.

GERRIE: That would be scary.

THERRY: No, that's what makes it possible that I'm never alone.

GERRIE: Hum.

THERRY: I don't know the meaning of loneliness; never had it. I've never been alone.

GERRIE: Well that part wouldn't be scary; I know a little bit about what that's like. Actually, it's better to have that for me, I mean, but I can't apply it to other people. But in myself, it can point out what's inconsistent.

THERRY: Well, it's an aid, that's the only reason why I, I don't mind letting you know of the inconsistencies, `cause that's the reason why you're here. As for the other part about the, the fact that it betrays the things that I can do, that, if there was a way that I could help you without you realizing that, I would. Because I always find that to be negative.

GERRIE: Why?

THERRY: Because once people know the extent to which I can do things, they stop thinking. And that I don't like.

GERRIE: Yea, it's easy to do that.

THERRY: It ought to be; you've done it often enough.

GERRIE: Yea. Well maybe you could answer this question, it's been bothering me, and now that you're not teaching me math, at least I don't think you are, I think the Universe stopped because I said I was going to stay here until I learned math, and I know that you guys want me to leave and go live my life, but I might be wrong about that, that was my hunch, so I--

THERRY: Was that your question?

GERRIE: Well, I--

THERRY: Or was that just another aside?

GERRIE: That was an aside, but could you answer it, was that the reason? Or was that--

THERRY: Are you asking me if I could, or are you asking me if I will?

GERRIE: If you will.

THERRY: No, I won't.

GERRIE: Could you? I guess you now have the information.

THERRY: Of course I could.

GERRIE: Well you told me--

THERRY: Doesn't change the fact that I won't just the same.

GERRIE: Well that's true, but a couple of weeks ago you said you didn't know why it stopped.

THERRY: I do know why now.

GERRIE: But it still stopped.

THERRY: You are correct. It has still stopped.

GERRIE: Could you tell me if it had to do with purple?

THERRY: I can't tell you anything about it.

GERRIE: Okay. My question had to do with, um, the vows that I thought I took, okay?

THERRY: Okay.

GERRIE: Um, my understanding was that they were Royal vows.

THERRY: Correct.

GERRIE: And that Royal vows meant that it was for eternity.

THERRY: There is a set of Royal vows that you took which is for eternity, that is true.

GERRIE: Okay.

THERRY: But it's not limited to that.

GERRIE: Okay, and was the part that was the Royal vows that was for eternity, the part about serving the state of Arkashea?

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: Okay. Now, I'm not sure how to ask the second part--

THERRY: Why not try to use words?

GERRIE: I'm trying, but I don't know if it will convey the question.

THERRY: Well, try it and find out. Do what you usually do: bring the words out according to the emotions that are present, and then we'll see what comes out.

GERRIE: Okay, when I first took them I thought that I vowed to either, I had a choice of an active or a passive door. And I thought that I took a vow to an active door for eternity.

THERRY: That is true.

GERRIE: But then I had a conversation with you out there about a month or two ago where you said vowing to an active or a passive door for eternity is ridiculous.

THERRY: That is true too, for a human.

GERRIE: Okay, well at that point I didn't know what I vowed to. The only part that I understand, or feel like I understand is the part that I vowed to the state of Arkashea for eternity; that I understand, accept, and still want to do.

THERRY: That is an active vow. For as long as you live, and for as long as you're under the Earth experience, you will never escape that vow.

GERRIE: Okay, but I also have a hunch that if I had chosen a passive door, that I would still have three chains, and not one.

THERRY: That is equally true. But I think you're missing something. I think you've thrown away, because of bemusement, the fact that there are levels.

GERRIE: Okay.

THERRY: And that while you may have had three chains, the influence of each is different. The same way as there is a difference between the vow to the political nature, as opposed to a vow to the spiritual nature. Their influences is rather different.

GERRIE: So I took vows to the spiritual nature. Is that true?

THERRY: Well, because of the way you're answering, or rather, you're asking the question, I've got to respond yes, but, it is not a total truth.

GERRIE: Okay, well, when I first took those vows, when I was--

THERRY: When you first took them?

GERRIE: No, when I was--this life, last summer--

THERRY: Okay.

GERRIE: When I was choosing between an active or a passive door--

THERRY: Yes.

GERRIE: My understanding of an active door was that it lead away from Maya--

THERRY: That is correct.

GERRIE: And away from individuality.

THERRY: That is correct. It was the Holy path.

GERRIE: Right.

THERRY: The Path to the Tree of Life.

GERRIE: And I understood that the passive door was the path towards Maya.

THERRY: That is correct too.

GERRIE: And I chose the active door because I thought it was the higher path.

THERRY: That is correct.

GERRIE: And then, when my two chains broke, because of decisions I made to live my life in the world--

THERRY: Again, because of the way you're asking the questions, I have to answer yes, but they are-it's not a total truth.

GERRIE: Then what am I--

THERRY: You're making the same error all over again.

GERRIE: Well, what is it?

THERRY: Because you've consistently speak of making a vow on a spiritual nature, of a spiritual subject, one does not limit it to one. Because you have made that particular vow, within yourself, within your heart, just between you and your God, whatever you conceive it to be, that does not mean that that's the only vow you took. The other vows that you have taken are affecting you just as much, even though they are confusing the hell out of you.

GERRIE: What other vows are those?

THERRY: Well, if you don't remember them, I sure as hell ain't gonna tell you.

GERRIE: Well, this life I remember two of them. One when got--

THERRY: Then why do you insist upon speaking of just one, as though one is all that existed?

GERRIE: Because I didn't think the other two were eternal, or Royal vows. One was--

THERRY: Hey, you remember a little while ago I told you that any belief that exists within its boundaries, is just as strong, and just as valid as a Royal belief.

GERRIE: Yes. And that's even if that belief is inaccurate, right?

THERRY: Hey, just because you have a brain, there's no guarantee that you're going to use it.

GERRIE: And that's because illusions are the driving force for reality?

THERRY: You've got it. So, if you took a vow that is non-Royal, within the specific limits of the confines of that vow it is just as far-reaching to you as any Royal vow that you have made. The only difference being it's limited within the confines of that vow, but it doesn't change the fact that the illusions are there, it doesn't change that reality's there, it doesn't change that the thoughts, the emotions, the pairings, and everything else that goes into reality is still there within its limits.

GERRIE: Well, I never understood, truly why those two others broke, and you told me it was because I was too active.

THERRY: Well, let me ask you a series of dumb questions that might help you understand. Why do you not spend most of your time playing with kindergartners?

GERRIE: `Cause I'm not a kindergartner.

THERRY: So what? Just because you're not a kindergartner, why can't you spend your time with them? Why can't they amuse you instead of other stuff?

GERRIE: `Cause our interests are different.

THERRY: Okay. Why are your interests different?

GERRIE: `Cause I've had different experiences than them which has given me different reference points and different perspectives that they don't yet have.

THERRY: Then why don't you apply that same type of thinking to the rest of your life? You remember the phrase that we constantly yoke about? It's awfully difficult to walk among turkeys once you've flown with eagles. Aren't they both saying the same thing?

GERRIE: Yea.

THERRY: So, if you have a level of intelligence or a level of understanding, or a level of access to certain psychic power that will make you inappropriate for lower levels, what are you going to do? You going to leave the higher levels aside and use the lower ones, or are you going to cast the lower ones aside, and insist on using the just higher ones? In other words, are you going to walk with Turkeys, just because you can?

GERRIE: Aren't you supposed to use both when you talk about casting away one or keeping one?

THERRY: Who decides what you're supposed to do.

GERRIE: I thought you did.

THERRY: Why should I decide--

GERRIE: I mean--

THERRY: The life-force was given to you, not to me. And it's your life we're talking about.

GERRIE: So the individual decides.

THERRY: Okay.

GERRIE: So me, I decide.

THERRY: Okay, so then why bitch if you insist on using just one and not use the other two. If you have elected for some reason to cast the others aside because they're no longer as valid for you, they don't serve your illusions very well, what's the problem?

GERRIE: But I didn't elect to lose them. I mean, to give--

THERRY: Then in that case you still have them, they're not broken.

GERRIE: But that's not true either, `cause I--

THERRY: Well one of the two's got to be true, can't have it both ways,

GERRIE: Well I did feel `em break.

THERRY: Then that means you must have cast them aside. Somehow you must have cast them aside, otherwise they would not have broken. Remember you are your only judge, and it is your illusions that create your reality, and if I come here and call you a taxi, that doesn't mean you're going to leave, and that doesn't mean you're going to turn around and become a taxi.

GERRIE: Well, I wanted a relationship.

THERRY: What you want, and what you get is not always the same. In either case, they must match whatever your illusions are.

GERRIE: So they didn't match?

THERRY: Something like that. Hey, if you want to be a brain surgeon, you'd better not go studying cosmetology, `cause you ain't going to get what you want. And if you expect Hitler to become your private Adonis, you'd better accept a disappointment. `Cause the only thing that you can control is what is within you, and then only to the degree that your Karma will allow you to.

GERRIE: Now wasn't the passive door a lower door?

THERRY: What's that got to do with the conversation?

GERRIE: Because that was originally--my confusion came over the terms active and passive, and the conversation in there where you said--

THERRY: Aren't you doing the same thing again?

GERRIE: Forgetting that there's levels?

THERRY: Yea. And each level is equally as important within the respective individual.

GERRIE: You also told me though, during our math lessons that passive, well, there's a law that each, let me see...

THERRY: Unto it's own kind?

GERRIE: No the one where you have one, and you also have the implication of the other because you have one.

THERRY: Oh, the point of transfusion?

GERRIE: And I asked you if that meant if you have an active door, do you also have passive within it? And you said yes, and if you have passive door, you also have active within it.

THERRY: Yes, that's the presence