Arkashean Q&A Session -- 015 (continues session 014)

EMELLE: All life-forms do it?

THERRY: Sure, you see it when cats meet other cats, when dogs meet new dogs, when dog meets cat and cat meets dog, there's always that interplay. Those are the four corners of that pillar of that illusion. Trust/mistrust, acceptance/rejection.

EMELLE: Huh. So when I was--Okay, but it's different when I was driving the car and I was scared; that wasn't the same pattern then right?

THERRY: Yea it was.

EMELLE: It was?


EMELLE: It was still trust/mistrust, acceptance/rejection?

THERRY: Sure, of course. In this particular case you brought in another version of it, but it's still, it's trusting your abilities versus mistrusting your abilities; trusting the drivers around you, versus mistrusting the drivers around you. Every time a driver did something that was wrong, you interpreted it as a rejection, how dare they. It's on a different level, but it's still the same pattern. So you brought in, according to your Maat, your defense mechanisms, which brought in all of your trade-offs.

EMELLE: But my arrogance for years then has been a compensation for covering up feelings that I wasn't as good, or that I couldn't do it.

THERRY: That's one of the effects of arrogance; it doesn't necessarily have to be the only effect. Remember, it too is a continuum.

EMELLE: What does that mean when you say arrogance, too, is a continuum?

THERRY: Arrogance is a continuum.

EMELLE: But does that mean that there can be from little bits of arrogance to greater bits of arrogance?

THERRY: That's one level of it. It also can be that arrogance can be used to protect your fear, to mask it, and it also could be used because you have such a big excessive ego that you believe that you're the only one that's right and good and holy. So you play the holier than thou game.

EMELLE: See I don't believe that I ever believed that, but I couldn't have told you that until this week, because it wasn't until this week that I realized that I go around scared all the time. Or, as you put it, mistrusting my abilities in almost every area, and I immediately get defensive about it.

THERRY: What can you expect? You never had the opportunity to learn it when you were young. Part of the trials and tribulations of children is the process of coming to terms with those four pillars.

EMELLE: And I always felt reject--I consistently, not always. I consistently felt rejected.

THERRY: I can accept that too.

EMELLE: Even though there were some people that accepted me. I was always wanting to be liked by the people that didn't like me, that were in the in crowd, and I always felt like I was on the out crowd, so consequently, in my mind, I made the out crowd the better crowd.

THERRY: Only because you were at war with the crowd that you really wanted to be part of. It goes back to people have a tendency to like those whom they think like them, etc., etc. The crowd that you initially wanted was your reference group which was your parents. They weren't there, so you had to take second best. Second best, in this case, was the rebellious society, so what else was new?

EMELLE: But in a lot of ways, second best really had better values.

THERRY: That's besides the point.

EMELLE: That's true; I didn't know that at the time.

THERRY: The process of coming to terms with the four pillars of that illusion have nothing to do with the validity or the value attached to the belief system itself.

EMELLE: So what does that mean, that the belief-system--

THERRY: Well, just because the so-called rebellious society had far better values in many instances than your parents did, didn't change the fact, and didn't have any effect upon the fact that you were coming to terms, in your own way, with the four pillars; the trust/mistrust, and the acceptance/rejection.

EMELLE: Being rejected by the peer group then that I wanted to be in.

THERRY: Right. Obviously, then, if you're going to feel as though you're being rejected constantly by your folks, then you're going to run to whatever is second best for you. The value-systems of each has got nothing to do with it.

EMELLE: Yea, speaking of that pattern, my cousin Waggy is the person that was the role-model to me for years and years; she was, essentially, the only hippie in the family, and over the past, well, since I was about nineteen, I started being friendly with her, or friends with her. Um, and then last year I saw her and I really liked her, and I really got the impression that we had known each other in the past, and that for some reason I kept getting the impression of something to do with gypsies; that we were probably knew each other at some sort of gypsy kind of a time. I don't know how accurate that is, but that was the impression I kept getting.

THERRY: That still deals with the four pillars.

EMELLE: But this time when I--

THERRY: There is not much difference in the parallelism between the acceptability of gypsies in their time, as opposed to the acceptability of the flower children in their time; the pattern's the same.

EMELLE: How's the pattern the same? I don't see it.

THERRY: Rejection is rejection; acceptance is acceptance; tolerability is tolerability.

EMELLE: Oh, okay, I could see that I guess. But what I was going to say was that this time when I saw her, I saw some different things.

THERRY: It's because you saw things now that you did not then because of the changes that occurred in both of you.

EMELLE: I was surprised, though, because I have fallen to a lower level then from the last time I saw her.

THERRY: That's one point of view.

EMELLE: Well, as far as my chain's breaking and stuff.

THERRY: Just because you could no longer have access to greater psychic power, doesn't mean necessarily that you fell to a lower level; all it means is that you no longer have access to as much power as you had before.

EMELLE: I thought that was a lower level.

THERRY: You could look at it that way if you wanted to, but that does not make you any better or any worse; it simply means that you're more limited in that area; it doesn't mean you're limited in other areas.

EMELLE: I guess I assumed that if I was more limited in that area then that would follow that I was more limited in levels of awareness, and of perceiving patterns of people.

THERRY: That part's true, but so what?

EMELLE: Well, so I was surprised that I made any new perceptions about somebody else that I've known for so long.

THERRY: What does this particular interaction that we just now had, what does that tell you?

EMELLE: That I'm making a lot of assumptions?

THERRY: Yea. What was the biggest assumption that you just made within this interaction?

EMELLE: I don't know?

THERRY: Think about it. Did you not make a conversion: less means none?

EMELLE: Yea, I didn't realize or notice it when I did it, but--

THERRY: I know. That's why I brought it up.


THERRY: That's a fun game to play; you can have a lot of fun with that one.

EMELLE: Well, what I choose to tell myself generally is I'll go as high as the Universe will let me, because I don't want to argue for my limitations, but it's also made me stop thinking--

THERRY: There's another way of looking at it.

EMELLE: Which is what?

THERRY: I can go as high as I will allow myself to go.


THERRY: I like that one better myself. Because it is more valid in the terms of telling me who judges me.

EMELLE: That's a good point. Gets back to where I put my responsibility on things.

THERRY: You got it.

EMELLE: Well I feel like I'd allow myself to go anywhere but apparently that doesn't work.

THERRY: Of course it does. Just because you feel you going to do something, doesn't mean you're going to do it.

EMELLE: Right, `cause something else is stopping you, right?

THERRY: Yea, your attitudes, so it's still yourself. If you sit there and tell yourself that you're going to become a brain surgeon, and you decide, well, you're going to go out and study rock music, I would hardly blame the Universe because you didn't become a brain surgeon.

EMELLE: So you're saying I've crossed wires in my communication to myself, because I've said I want one thing but I do another thing in terms of behavior.

THERRY: Now that's a little closer to the truth.

EMELLE: And you consistently try to tell me, or have been trying to teach me that I can't have both, and I can't have everything.

THERRY: That is correct; you cannot serve two masters.

EMELLE: And I guess I do convert it in my mind to having none of everything, including awareness about other people.

THERRY: Well, as I said before, that's a fun game. Specially if you're a masochist; you can have a lot of fun with that one.

EMELLE: And so I have been surprised when I like, make realizations about anything lately.

THERRY: At least they teach you, however late. Better late than never.

EMELLE: That's true. (laughter) Well I brought this up about my cousin because I uh--

THERRY: She's only a pawn. Because if you look that closely to anyone, you'll find the same patterns; each individual is very very busy doing whatever it is they feel they must do in order to survive within the game they've chosen to play. If you understand the laws of your illusion, through this understanding you can also use synthesis learning to understand their illusions, and therein lies the New Covenant.

EMELLE: How does therein lie the New Covenant?

THERRY: When the final judgement comes, it will come against Man, the species, not the individual. What you do to another, you have done to yourself. If you refuse them their freedom, you have refused your own freedom, and as the New Covenant states, even the darkest soul, even the most trapped spirit, can find freedom, they need only gaze into the Hound--the eyes of their Hound-of-Hell. And that means nothing more then, hey, you want to free yourself? Learn the laws of your illusion. If you know the laws of your illusion, you can free yourself from them, if you so choose. The Hound of the Hell-of-your-own-thoughts will lead you from your trap, but your harpies will drive you into the traps.

EMELLE: What's the definition of a harpy?

THERRY: Look it up in the dictionary.

EMELLE: Harpy--um, Greek myth; any of several hideous filthy rapacious winged monsters with the head and trunk of a woman, and the tail, legs, and talons of a bird. Two: Relentless, greedy or grasping person; three: A shrewish woman; Four: Same as a harpy eagle. Harpy eagle: A large black and white short-winged tropical American eagle with a double crest, and a powerful bill and claws.

THERRY: Okay, you've got the basis of it. It's in the Greek thing.

EMELLE: The winged monsters?

THERRY: Yea, winged monsters. Basically they were ah, they were usually sent by Zeus to torment man.

EMELLE: Nice guy, this Zeus was.

THERRY: Well, the thing being is that they were in punishment for something that the individual has done. The harpy usually tormented them, and hence we use that term, harpy, as when you have a thought, a feeling, or something, a game that you insist upon playing which torments you constantly; it becomes your harpy. The instrument of your guilt feelings, the demand that you should be punished. So it becomes your harpy.

EMELLE: What about, like, desires to be gay? Is that a harpy?

THERRY: Could be, but it doesn't have to be. It certainly can be a trap, however, or lead you into one.

EMELLE: Yea, `cause you said your harpies lead you into your traps.

THERRY: Right.

EMELLE: But I can see where it wouldn't quite fit the definition once you're there. I mean, once you've learned the game, it's not the same thing as being tormented by something.

THERRY: Well that's not necessarily true; remember, just because you have a brain, there's no guarantee you're going to use it.

EMELLE: Well, that's true. Yea, for some people I guess it is a harpy,

THERRY: Uh-huh.

EMELLE: By that definition. Well this brings me to another thought, but I wanted to finish my first thought. The first thought of that paragraph was talking about my cousin and the only reason I brought that up is because I see her, as I said, in a very different light, and I guess I started to dislike her some, um...


EMELLE: Well, I guess because she was more violent in her mind then I ever noticed that she was.

THERRY: Are you sure that's why? And not simply one of the loose threads?

EMELLE: I didn't think it was a loose thread because I still felt just as accepted by her as ever but I-

THERRY: Yea, but think more deeply. Is there not a seed of betrayal there?

EMELLE: I don't think so; how would there be?

THERRY: `Cause she no longer fits the illusion that you painted of her.

EMELLE: Hum, I didn't think of that as the seed of betrayal, but I did think about that later; my next sentence was going to be that later I realized that I had no right to think that because she was just as nice to me as ever, and I realized that just because I see different things in her now than I used to, doesn't mean that, she's still trying to do the best she can, and she's still just as nice to me as she ever was. It's another hero with a feet of clay.

THERRY: Right, so what she does in this particular scenario is of very little importance; she's simply a pawn, as I've said before. In this particular case, you just now got another example of a continuum, and that how easy betrayal can be one of the points along that continuum, and be so subtle that it's difficult to realize. Once you paint somebody into the picture, if that somebody doesn't always live up to that portrait that you've painted, it's an automatic betrayal there, plus a little bit of rejection. Perhaps that is why you had those anger feelings towards her that you couldn't necessarily put your finger on. But because of the teachings that you've had thus far, you automatically came up with the understanding that you did not have that right to place those things on her. So while you came to the proper solution, you couldn't find the cause. That was a good example of synthesis thinking.

EMELLE: Yea, that's true; I couldn't find the cause. The reason, changing the subject a little, but getting back to harpies, my other cousin whom, this is funny too, I didn't ever like as much as her sister, who's this first cousin I'm talking about, well, the second cousin, now, I guess I shouldn't say I like her better, but there are qualities in her that I find more appealing.

THERRY: Perhaps because those qualities serve your present illusion better. Or more appropriately.

EMELLE: Yea, I thin k so. I think she has, she's kinder.

THERRY: Doesn't that go back to the mutual satisfaction of needs continuum?

EMELLE: Well how would that be satisfying my needs if--

THERRY: If those qualities serve your illusions, are you not, in fact, busy on another canvas, painting a new picture?

EMELLE: Except now I'm not looking for a hero; I don't think I'm looking to make her someone to look up to.

THERRY: Does that make it any less a new canvas?

EMELLE: I don't know; does it?

THERRY: Aren't you still painting a new picture?

EMELLE: Yea. So I guess it's still a canvas. Well in this person, had a question, indirectly, for you. She asked for help from me, if I could get her the information, but I knew that I would come here and ask you, because I certainly did not know the answer, and that was, um, oh, another question is for me, from me, um, I did not present you this time as a guru or a teacher, but-- and so I presented you as a friend that knew a lot of things, and I described Kim's situation to her as you know, this guy who had a rend, and I described what a rend was, and I described that, you know, he was going a little bit bananas; I didn't give anything away of his, his, but I just said that you help him understand it, and learn to control it, and now, even though he still has it, that he doesn't freak out anymore, and, you know, he's a normal guy, living a normal life, so to speak.

THERRY: Whatever normal is.

EMELLE: Right. Um, but I wasn't sure how to portray you, because last time--

THERRY: Why portray me at all?

EMELLE: Well, because--

THERRY: Why draw pictures? Why not simply say that, as you said, there's a friend who's been able to help me understand things, and just leave it at that. No, there's no need to tell these people that I'm a psychic in the Monastery.

EMELLE: Because last year I used the word Guru, and teacher a lot, but I realized today when I was talking to Bill, and a little bit even before I told him this, that people, when I use that word, paint their own picture, according to their own reference points, and it's not accurate, and it--

THERRY: Well, you just made a presumption.

EMELLE: Okay, you're right. A lot of times it's not accurate. A lot of times people automatically think of a Jim Jones type guy. Um, and, at the same time it generally comes up something about you in my life, so this time that's what I chose to handle it as.

THERRY: That's fine.

EMELLE: Um, and her thing is, she says that she feels haunted by an ability to have premonitions, um--

THERRY: She has about four harpies. One of them is quite nasty.


THERRY: Anyway, continue your questions.

EMELLE: Alright, well, the question was, she doesn't know how to tell what things are her own thoughts, and what things are premonitions.

THERRY: Perhaps the best beginning for her is to learn the laws of reality. For her to understand the nature of reality, itself, and its mutinous levels. And in that time, she can read, she has time for that, plus she can talk to you, `cause you have a fairly good understanding of reality now, you're not a master at it, but, hey, who is? Just because I know ninety-nine percent of the laws of reality, that doesn't make me a master. At any rate--

EMELLE: What can she read? I mean, we don't have any of our books published, and that's what I would love to give her. Is there anything else she could read that might give her any--

THERRY: Well, in the beginning, you can do a lot of talking verbally, plus she can always write down a list a questions which we'll be glad to respond to.

EMELLE: That's true. I told her I'd send her more information. So I'm not quite sure, um, I mean should I write all that stuff down in a letter and tell her these are the things you can do?

THERRY: Again now, you're asking me what you should do; you know I won't answer to those things-- You already know that I refuse to tell you what to do with your life. I can simply respond to specific questions in terms of patterns of creation, but beyond that I won't go.

EMELLE: Okay, well, I told her that I'd get back to her, and I'd send her something. Um, so I guess I could write a letter? I mean I don't want to pass myself off as gee, you can talk to me, and I know this stuff, I mean, how do I put that?

THERRY: Well, there are a number of possibilities. What you spoke of is one of them, without actually saying it. You could easily, simply respond to the question, without saying that see how smart I am.

EMELLE: Well, that's a good idea. I guess if you give me the information to answer, I could answer, I mean, if you would do that.

THERRY: Plus, within that same sphere of influence, I would demand that you do your own thinking.

EMELLE: Well I had intended to write her a letter-- But, except, see I remember the letter we wrote to my Mom's friend a while ago, and she never responded back to us, so I guess she had her own reasons for doing that. But Billy's question was very specific, and she already asked the question, and I told her that I would get back to her with more information.

THERRY: Which is fine. So ask the question, already.

EMELLE: So, okay, so the question is how does she tell which are premonitions, and which are her thoughts?

THERRY: Okay, first of all, one of her harpies is driving her towards a specific sect type of religion. She has to override that without negativity. Secondly, another of her harpies, the nasty one, has her inside a war. That war has to be put to rest. She has to come to understand that it is necessary to have both, the he and the she in equal balance, where one is no more important than the other before she can learn to enter our world. Next, she'll have to learn a new language; the language of specific terms whereby she does not attribute them to any specific religion, but simply a concept of language. The way the word chair, or the couch, they mean very specific concepts, and you don't attribute those concepts to any specific religious or philosophical thought; she has to have that ability. That ability will give her the ability to accept knowledge from all sources without prejudices, and without preferences. That will allow her to investigate and find what is appropriate for her; with the understanding, of course, that as she gains more knowledge, her pseudo-Maat will consistently change. And that changes should not be judged as neither good nor bad, simply the recognition that as you gain more information, what is the center called you, or her, in this case, will evolve. Then she has to get into understanding the laws of creation; not religious; none of that religious bullshit, but the laws of creation. We don't care which God did it, we only care about how it was done. So the best way is to look at it from an evolvement point of view rather than a fictitious power force such as a god who comes down and decreed it to occur. You can throw the nip(?) out; look at it from evolvement point of view. Once she achieves those, then she'll be ready, but not before. Right at the moment she's seeking, but she's too colored; her thinking is prejudiced, even though it's troubled.

EMELLE: She says that she has dreams and that in the next few weeks they come true. And that, um, she's scared of them. And that she doesn't think that now that she has a family, that she could even deal with this very well.

THERRY: She won't have much choice.

EMELLE: Doesn't sound like she has much choice; she'd like it to leave her alone.

THERRY: It won't.


THERRY: I don't think she's going to like what she would have to do. `Cause she may have to--I can't say anymore.

EMELLE: Okay, I can accept that.

THERRY: See, the big problem would be the belief system of her husband.

EMELLE: Yea, he's Baptist, and, uh, I don't know, I don't think he practices anything, but he's definitely got a real strong belief system.


EMELLE: And, uh, I said that that is a hard one, because especially when you're dealing with yourself, you can very much make things a self-fulfilling prophecy if you believe `um.

THERRY: That's true.

EMELLE: Um, I did tell her the law Illusions are the Driving Force for Reality. Um, I was trying to explain it, and I couldn't explain it well enough without telling her the law, so I told her the law. Um and I was describing how, you know, how we form our own reality through our thoughts, so that thoughts are definitely powerful, but that just because we think them doesn't mean that they happen. I mean that's also true, right? They're on their own level, and they're evaluated on their own level unless we choose to bring them into the physical by our behavior, right?

THERRY: Yea, it has to be a pairing before reality comes into it.

EMELLE: So that's what I told her. Because I was describing how people make illusions and how people also fight their illusions. I was using a Kung-Fu episode, as, you know, I was telling her about this one I saw where Cane made all his illusions appear before him and all his harpies and all his fears because of what he thought, but that didn't mean that they were premonitions either; they were thoughts which was different.

THERRY: Yea, but don't forget the other side of that reality. What you spoke of is valid, but that's only one side of the duality.

EMELLE: Which is the other side? That thoughts are the basis of reality?

THERRY: No, the other half of it is, while one side says it doesn't necessarily mean that it is, the other side says, it is.

EMELLE: How so?

THERRY: Remember, the first of all the great dualities is the presence and the absence, so if you have a target thought that says just because you have a thought that doesn't make that thought real, that's the absence of it. The presence of it would say, if you have a thought, it will become real.

EMELLE: Hum, well then, how do you, how do you deal in reality then, with that? Which one do you follow?

THERRY: Well, when you're on the level that you have those psychic belts and they're active, then you need to learn the laws of your illusion much more so because there's a whole lot of other forces involved.

EMELLE: But she couldn't make it happen by thinking it, could she?


EMELLE: Well, I figured, see that's why I didn't know how much to tell her because I know that that's possible; that's what magic is based on, and that's what travel on other levels is based on.

THERRY: That is correct. But just because you think it, that doesn't automatically mean that it will exist, because you have to take into account the pairing.

EMELLE: You have to pair it with the work to get it here into reality, don't you?

THERRY: Well, there's a number of pairings that take place, but nonetheless once the pairing is there, then yes, it will happen.

EMELLE: What's the other pairings?

THERRY: Well, I really don't want to give you too much about the pairings because I don't think you can handle them properly, and I don't trust you with them.

EMELLE: Okay. I trust you to protect me. I'm not going to question your judgment. I have enough trouble with whether I should eat soup that has little bits of pork in it, or wear earrings or not. (laughter) I'll just tell her I asked my friend and this is what he said, and she can take it for what she wants to take it for...

THERRY: See the problem comes in that she has entered my world, the psychic world... not in this life, per se, but in past life.

EMELLE: I could tell that by the accuracy of the things she said she saw, and how they came about.

THERRY: And as a result of that, she doesn't belong to herself anymore. She's trying to exercise a certain amount of free-will to satisfy what she views as her own needs, but on a psychic level, she doesn't have that right. So, therefore, until she comes to know the laws of the illusion that she's under, she's going to have problems with her abilities. Also, her psychic realm will continue to bother her until she makes a difficult choice.

EMELLE: She says that she wishes she could understand them so that she could use them as a gift to help people.

THERRY: She could do that.

EMELLE: And then she told me about this lady that the police use all the time when weird things are going on and she sees them, and that was the example she gave me was something like that. She also gave me a picture that cued me in to probably what she was like some life when she had them, because she said that she pictured that she couldn't use them while she has kids and a husband, and I'm not sure why she said that, but she said that she could only use them up in a mountain somewhere. She could picture herself as like some old woman, as like a hermit or something using these abilities. And I, I don't know if this is true, but I cued into the fact that that was probably some life when she had them and when she used them.

THERRY: What she's talking about is she doesn't belong in the outside world.

EMELLE: Well, she's, it's funny, because she got married pretty late, I mean, she always seemed pretty sad, and I really never thought she'd get married, and I felt sorry for her `cause I knew she wanted it so much, and I thought she'd be a pretty good mom, and she is a pretty good mom, but, boy, is she devoted. I mean, she's so devoted to those kids that it might not be so good for `em. Or, I don't know, maybe it'll be great for `em, but they sure are, I mean you talk about their needs being met, she's there for them every single second. The interesting thing is her husband's not. He's um, he hardly helps her, in my opinion, at all. I mean he does work hard; he's a lawyer, he works like twelve to sixteen hours a day, and, but--

THERRY: That's not the important part. If he's not there, it's not because he doesn't want to be; remember, he too, has his fears.

EMELLE: Yea, yea that's true.

THERRY: So you can't judge him harshly.

EMELLE: When he's there he's really nice to the kids, but he's not there a lot, and when he is there he definitely, I mean, she takes care of him. He's like a third kid. I mean, she was really sick, and he didn't give her all that much help. He gave her help when we were all around observing their relationship, but otherwise, if either of them got to sleep, because they have this new baby, it's him that sleeps; not her, and she the one that gets up and makes all the meals for him as well as for the kids, and she's the one that does all that kind of stuff all the time for all three of them. Which I didn't think was such a thrill. I figured, God, if I was going to have a kid, and wanted one so bad, I may as well have a baby and have only it to deal with, then have it and an adult to take care of at the same time.

THERRY: Don't look now, but your prejudice is showing.

EMELLE: Yea, that's true. I didn't think he was very supportive.

THERRY: I think you're being rather insensitive right now.

EMELLE: That may be true.

THERRY: Aren't you forgetting that it is their game, not yours?

EMELLE: Yea, that part's true.

THERRY: Aren't you also forgetting that given the laws of their respective illusions, each can do no more then what those laws will allow them?

EMELLE: Yea, that's true.

THERRY: So therefore, why become angry at somebody because they have a headache?

EMELLE: Yea, I guess that's true too.

THERRY: From where I understand, rather than be somewhat down on him, you should praise him because he is making whatever efforts his laws will allow to change the situation so that the pattern can be broken.

EMELLE: That part's true. As far as how he treats his kids, it definitely is.

THERRY: Not necessarily because of how he treats the children, but how he treats himself.

EMELLE: Yea, that part's true too. He probably has a lot of problems from that kind of a childhood. Oh, I know he does; he told me something about their marriage last time I was there which appears to be going better, but for a while it looked like it was pretty much over.

THERRY: Yea. The old patterns were too strong. He's due to have a crisis in his psychology. Depending on how he handles it, and the duration of it, that will determine what happens with them.

EMELLE: If someone lives in a monastery, and takes vows, oh I guess it depends on how long they take their vows for. I was going to ask if the vows--if then you had to take them for eternity, but I guess it depends, right?

THERRY: Doesn't everything depend? Remember the nature of the continuum?

EMELLE: Which aspect? You mean just that it's a continuum, like a little change--

THERRY: Right, with all the respective levels. Vows are a continuum too. So time. Obviously if you make a vow, that you're going to learn to type, well, that vow is in effect until you've learned to type, which could be six months, two weeks; could be four life-times. But nonetheless, that vow is in effect only until you have already learned to type. Once you have achieved, that vow is no longer valid. But if you've made a vow to become Superman, well, you've got a longer wait.

EMELLE: I've never wanted to make a vow to a Monastery because I always thought that you'd have to make it life after life after life to the monastery.

THERRY: I think your words, your thoughts, and your feelings do not match. Because I've picked up that your words are scattered, your thoughts have to do with the political nature of something, and your feelings has to do with the concept of spirituality... and the fear that goes with it.

EMELLE: I guess that's pretty accurate. I guess--

THERRY: With such diffuseness, how could you possibly come out with intelligence?

EMELLE: Well, I guess I was thinking about the physical Monastery with its political implications.

THERRY: Those were parts of the words.

EMELLE: Well, that's what I was aware of thinking, but I guess I--

THERRY: But your feelings weren't there.

EMELLE: Well I guess my feelings associate a monastery with spirituality.

THERRY: Then, in that case, Jim Jones must have been a pretty holy guy.


THERRY: So, that shows a measure of inconsistency in your thoughts versus your belief system. Just because someone lives in a so-called place that's supposed to be sanctified, that doesn't mean the place, nor he, is.

EMELLE: That's true.

THERRY: And if one is trying to learn, one should have the three parts of them agree before they open their mouth.

EMELLE: I wasn't aware of not agreeing; you cheated... you looked inside me... (laughter) But I'm glad you did, because it made me aware of something, but I didn't, I wasn't aware that it was different.

THERRY: Don't I always cheat? How can I possibly not use the abilities that I have. I mean that's like me suddenly not knowing my own name. Why do you think I live in a monastery for? Because I can--there is never a time when I can shut the lights. The lights are always there.

EMELLE: That would be scary.

THERRY: No, that's what makes it possible that I'm never alone. I don't know the meaning of loneliness; never had it. I've never been alone.

EMELLE: Well that part wouldn't be scary; I know a little bit about what that's like. Actually, it's better to have that for me, I mean, but I can't apply it to other people. But in myself, it can point out what's inconsistent.

THERRY: Well, it's an aid, that's the only reason why I, I don't mind letting you know of the inconsistencies, `cause that's the reason why you're here. As for the other part about the, the fact that it betrays the things that I can do, that, if there was a way that I could help you without you realizing that, I would. Because I always find that to be negative.


THERRY: Because once people know the extent to which I can do things, they stop thinking. And that I don't like.

EMELLE: Yea, it's easy to do that.

THERRY: It ought to be; you've done it often enough.

EMELLE: Yea. Well maybe you could answer this question, it's been bothering me, and now that you're not teaching me math, at least I don't think you are, I think the Universe stopped because I said I was going to stay here until I learned math, and I know that you guys want me to leave and go live my life, but I might be wrong about that, that was my hunch, so I--

THERRY: Was that your question?

EMELLE: Well, I--

THERRY: Or was that just another aside?

EMELLE: That was an aside, but could you answer it, was that the reason? Or was that--

THERRY: Are you asking me if I could, or are you asking me if I will?

EMELLE: If you will.

THERRY: No, I won't.

EMELLE: Well that's true, but a couple of weeks ago you said you didn't know why a lot of my psychic stuff stopped.

THERRY: I do know why now.

EMELLE: But it still stopped.

THERRY: You are correct. It has still stopped.

EMELLE: Could you tell me if it had to do with purple? Okay. My question had to do with, um, the vows that I thought I took, okay?


EMELLE: Um, my understanding was that they were Royal vows.

THERRY: Correct.

EMELLE: And that Royal vows meant that it was for eternity.

THERRY: There is a set of Royal vows that you took which is for eternity, that is true.


THERRY: But it's not limited to that.

EMELLE: Okay, and was the part that was the Royal vows that was for eternity, the part about serving the state of Arkashea?


EMELLE: Okay. Now, I'm not sure how to ask the second part--

THERRY: Why not try to use words?

EMELLE: I'm trying, but I don't know if it will convey the question.

THERRY: Well, try it and find out. Do what you usually do: bring the words out according to the emotions that are present, and then we'll see what comes out.

EMELLE: Okay, when I first took them... my vows to hold wisdom sacred, I thought that I vowed to either, I had a choice of an active or a passive door. And I thought that I took a vow to an active door for eternity.

THERRY: That is true, for a human.

EMELLE: Okay, well at that point I didn't know what I vowed to. The only part that I understand, or feel like I understand is the part that I vowed to the state of Arkashea for eternity; that I understand, accept, and still want to do.

THERRY: That is an active vow. For as long as you live, and for as long as you're under the Earth experience, you will never escape that vow.

EMELLE: Okay, but I also have a hunch that if I had chosen a passive door, that I would still have three chains, and not one.

THERRY: That is equally true. But I think you're missing something. I think you've thrown away, because of bemusement, the fact that there are levels.


THERRY: And that while you may have had three chains, the influence of each is different. The same way as there is a difference between the vow to the political nature, as opposed to a vow to the spiritual nature. Their influences is rather different.

EMELLE: So I took vows to the spiritual nature. Is that true?

THERRY: Well, because of the way you're asking the question, I've got to respond yes, but, it is not a total truth.

EMELLE: Okay, well, when I first took those vows, when I was--

THERRY: When you first took them?

EMELLE: No, when I was--this life, last summer--


EMELLE: When I was choosing between an active or a passive door--


EMELLE: My understanding of an active door was that it lead away from Maya--

THERRY: That is correct.

EMELLE: And away from individuality.

THERRY: That is correct. It was the Holy path.

EMELLE: Right.

THERRY: The Path to the Tree of Life.

EMELLE: And I understood that the passive door was the path towards Maya.

THERRY: That is correct too.

EMELLE: And I chose the active door because I thought it was the higher path.

THERRY: That is correct.

EMELLE: And then, when my two chains broke, because of decisions I made to live my life in the world--

THERRY: Again, because of the way you're asking the questions, I have to answer yes, but they are-it's not a total truth.

EMELLE: Then what am I--

THERRY: You're making the same error all over again.

EMELLE: Well, what is it?

THERRY: Because you've consistently speak of making a vow on a spiritual nature, of a spiritual subject, one does not limit it to one. Because you have made that particular vow, within yourself, within your heart, just between you and your God, whatever you conceive it to be, that does not mean that that's the only vow you took. The other vows that you have taken are affecting you just as much, even though they are confusing the hell out of you.

EMELLE: What other vows are those?

THERRY: Well, if you don't remember them, I sure as hell ain't gonna tell you.

EMELLE: Well, this life I remember two of them. One when got--

THERRY: Then why do you insist upon speaking of just one vow, as though one is all that existed?

EMELLE: Because I didn't think the other two were eternal, or Royal vows. One was--

THERRY: Hey, you remember a little while ago I told you that any belief that exists within its boundaries, is just as strong, and just as valid as a Royal belief within those boundaries?

EMELLE: Yes. And that's even if that belief is inaccurate, right?

THERRY: Hey, just because you have a brain, there's no guarantee that you're going to use it.

EMELLE: And that's because illusions are the driving force for reality?

THERRY: You've got it. So, if you took a vow that is non-Royal, within the specific limits of the confines of that vow it is just as far-reaching to you as any Royal vow that you have made. The only difference being it's limited within the confines of that vow, but it doesn't change the fact that the illusions are there, it doesn't change that reality's there, it doesn't change that the thoughts, the emotions, the pairings, and everything else that goes into reality is still there within its limits.

EMELLE: Well, I never understood, truly why those two other psychic chains broke, and you told me it was because I was too active in the earth world when I should be active in the spiritual world.

THERRY: Well, let me ask you a series of dumb questions that might help you understand. Why do you not spend most of your time playing with kindergartners?

EMELLE: `Cause I'm not a kindergartner.

THERRY: So what? Just because you're not a kindergartner, why can't you spend your time with them? Why can't they amuse you instead of other stuff?

EMELLE: `Cause our interests are different.

THERRY: Okay. Why are your interests different?

EMELLE: `Cause I've had different experiences than them which has given me different reference points and different perspectives that they don't yet have.

THERRY: Then why don't you apply that same type of thinking to the rest of your life? You remember the phrase that we constantly joke about? "It's awfully difficult to walk among turkeys once you've flown with eagles." Aren't they both saying the same thing?


THERRY: So, if you have a level of intelligence or a level of understanding, or a level of access to certain psychic power that will make you inappropriate for lower levels, what are you going to do? You going to leave the higher levels aside and use the lower ones, or are you going to cast the lower ones aside, and insist on using the just higher ones? In other words, are you going to walk with Turkeys, just because you can?

EMELLE: Aren't you supposed to use both when you talk about casting away one or keeping one?

THERRY: Who decides what you're supposed to do. The life-force was given to you, not to me. And it's your life we're talking about.

EMELLE: So me, I decide.

THERRY: Okay, so then why bitch if you insist on using just one and not use the other two. If you have elected for some reason to cast the others aside because they're no longer as valid for you, they don't serve your illusions very well, what's the problem?

EMELLE: Well I did feel `em break... and I did lose a lot of my psychic powers!

THERRY: Somehow you must have cast them aside, otherwise they would not have broken. Remember you are your only judge, and it is your illusions that create your reality, and if I come here and call you a taxi, that doesn't mean you're going to leave, and that doesn't mean you're going to turn around and become a taxi.

EMELLE: Well, I wanted a relationship.

THERRY: What you want, and what you get is not always the same. In either case, they must match whatever your illusions are.

EMELLE: So they didn't match?

THERRY: Something like that. Hey, if you want to be a brain surgeon, you'd better not go studying cosmetology, `cause you ain't going to get what you want. And if you expect Banm to become your private Adonis, you'd better accept a disappointment. `Cause the only thing that you can control is what is within you, and then only to the degree that your Karma will allow you to.

EMELLE: Now wasn't the passive door a lower door?

THERRY: What's that got to do with the conversation?

EMELLE: Because that was originally--my confusion came over the terms active and passive, and the conversation in there where you said--

THERRY: Aren't you doing the same thing again?

EMELLE: Forgetting that there's levels?

THERRY: Yea. And each level is equally as important within the respective individual.

EMELLE: You also told me though, during our math lessons that passive, well, there's a law that each, let me see--

THERRY: Unto it's own kind?

EMELLE: No the one where you have one, and you also have the implication of the other because you have one.

THERRY: Oh, the point of transfusion?

EMELLE: And I asked you if that meant if you have an active door, do you also have passive within it? And you said yes, and if you have passive door, you also have active within it.

THERRY: Yes, that's the presence path. The active and the passive door will exist as long as you keep them within their proper areas, now what? Maybe it's because mortals on the basis have not evolved sufficiently to understand and to accept that levels have limitations, and one is just as valid as the other within its limitations.

EMELLE: So the active and the passive door is just as valid as each other within its limitations?


EMELLE: Because I told you that I thought the passive door was lower, and you told me that you thought I didn't understand some of the things.

THERRY: You don't, because you keep consistently mix the levels. The absence of a target behavior can have its effect equally as the presence of a target behavior; just because they're different, that doesn't make them one less or more than the other.

EMELLE: But if I had chosen the passive door, what would that have meant? Because I know it would have meant I would have still had a lot more access to power? Is that--

THERRY: Just different.

EMELLE: Just different? Would that have condemned me to Maya for eternity and not--

THERRY: The only thing that condemns you to Maya is your own choice.

EMELLE: But that would have been a choice, right?

THERRY: Yea, well, it's equally obviously that if you're on the path, that if you have elected to go on the path that leads you into Maya, obviously that choice is going to condemn you to Maya.... and, you will be limited to the power that's allowed there.

EMELLE: So then how could you still have more access to more power? I don't understand that.

THERRY: You are the one that keeps bringing that little word, more. I have not yet brought it in to the conversation.

EMELLE: How about more then I have now? Still doesn't belong in the conversation?

THERRY: Still does not belong in the conversation.