Arkashean Q&A Session -- 018 (continues session 017)

CORA: What can I do that someone else couldn't?

THERRY: You could bring people in very easy.

CORA: That sounds pretty funny to someone who hasn't gotten laid in about two years.

THERRY: Yeah, but don't forget, if you think back every time you could have, if you wanted to, a number of times, but you chose to uphold the law. The funny part about it is because of the magic and upholding it, you're going to get laid far less then other people will. Your instances of dead board romances are going to be far fewer than the average person because law and honor is standing in your way. Because, let's face it, on the one hand, you have sworn to try to free others from Maya, but the behavior that you see is designed to trap them into Maya. So, you've got yourself some fun conflicts.

CORA: Well, the behavior that I see doesn't trap them anymore if they're already in it.

THERRY: That's true, but unfortunately you're not always attracted to somebody that's already in it.

CORA: No, that's true.

THERRY: So that cuts down quite a bit of opportunities.

CORA: Yeah, but I don't think it's right, I guess, when they're not in it. I mean, the only ones I've even gone near were people that I thought were in it, even though some of these people, it was iffy, so you're right, I stayed away from it. But if I hadn't even thought they were in it I wouldn't go near them either.

THERRY: Okay, but the point there is if you did not have the burden of that chain--

CORA: I probably would have just gone for it.

THERRY: Exactly. So the occasions of you--

CORA: Yeah, I guess if you look at it that way I could have had five more women, so to speak. All I usually do is date `em, and get to know `em, and if it's not right, I don't do it. But the one time I did do it with someone, she got all wielded out and that was that. But, yeah, there's a burden even without this chain to bringing somebody out--of course maybe some people don't take any responsibility for that.

THERRY: They don't. None of them do.

CORA: Well, I don't know.

THERRY: It's a case of conquest. The same thing when a male tries to break a cherry.

CORA: There's one person I know that specifically wouldn't break up with someone they had brought out just because they were going through a hard time, and they felt like they should deal with that individual and all the stuff that it brings out.

THERRY: Now you've left the vein of generality.

CORA: That's true. She's one--she's not the norm for that.

THERRY: So you can't use that as your reference point.

CORA: And she tends to bring out a lot of people too, but-- not to change the subject again, but, you once said that because we Arkasheans didn't come down here for ourselves and our own experience, that it's not like other people. I mean, I hear other people say at some point along the line, that they don't have to take this anymore, and they don't, and it's for their own self-preservation, and to me that sure sounds like a good decision. Are you saying that we aren't supposed to do that because our purpose here is different?

THERRY: What I'm saying is if an individual is desiring to help another individual, the first thing that they have to recognize is whatever happens, it's not personal. Therefore, their inner being should be rock-solid, and should not be affected by what happens. If you start out liking somebody, then you should end up liking that same person regardless of what occurred. Simply because you know ahead of time that they're in pain; you know ahead of time that they're going to give you a whole load of pain. But if you love them enough to try to help them, accept the fact that that pain is not really truly yours. Everything they say and everything they do, it is the dark side within them that is crying. It has got nothing to do with them personally wanting to harm you; it's simply a case of them trying to get out of the pain that they're in, therefore if you insist upon taking things personally, then you have no business trying to help them, `cause you can't even help yourself. And, until you're capable of helping them, you ain't gonna be able to help yourself either. That's what I'm saying.

All power must return to its source. And it's obvious that in order to help somebody, you're gonna have to get a little dirty; you're gonna have to take on some of the emotions, and some of the situation that they're going to throw at you. And it must also be equally as obvious that people don't hurt people by throwing lies at them; they try to find things that are true, they try to find things that people are sensitive about, and that's what they use. So if you ain't already at peace with yourself, and if you haven't already accepted what you are, when you are, and how you are, then that means that people have ammunition against you. So if you already know what you are, and if you already accept everything that you are, then nobody can ever say anything about you that should be able to get you mad. That's what I'm saying. Somebody who is in quicksand should not reach out and try to help somebody else. They've got enough problems helping themselves. Does that make any sense?

CORA: Yeah. What did you mean when you said that if I couldn't help them, then I couldn't help myself?

THERRY: You're all in the same boat. A trap is a trap is a trap is a trap. Everybody on this planet is in exactly the same boat. They either obey law unequivocally, or they end up in pain. Now, you have spent how many years now learning law?

CORA: Eight, nine.

THERRY: So, you know law, at least you know quite a few of them. So if you insist on refusing to obey them, you have nobody to blame for your pain but you.

CORA: Well, that's true.

THERRY: At least your mother is honest enough to realize that she doesn't know what she's doing; she has no knowledge of law. To her it's perfectly okay to go out and hurt somebody if it's for their own good. You know better. She does not know patterns, you do. That doesn't mean it's going to hurt any less, but if you insist on refusing to obey law, then get the hell out of the brotherhood because it's going to be too painful for you. For you pain is going to be twice as worse because you know law. Because of the fact that you know law, you can see things that other people just cannot see, you know things that other people cannot know, and you feel things that other people just cannot have.

CORA: I guess those are the gifts for coming down here and dealing with people in the first place.

THERRY: Yeah, but it doesn't change the fact that it hurts. There's a river of tears behind helping anybody. You can usually tell a great master, because all you have to do is follow the river of tears.

CORA: You know, that's funny, I went down there, and everyone, especially one person, but after that a couple other people picked it up too, is they kept saying I was sad. I just didn't seem happy, and my mother thinks it's from my lifestyle. It's got nothing to do with my lifestyle. I probably do seem sad to them because I do see a lot and I just don't play some of the games in the same way that they do.

I mean, even though I had this problem with her, it's just, I mean, you know, I was nice, and I was helpful, and I did all the stuff you're supposed to do for the holidays and stuff, and went over to my sister-in-laws. She was the one who picked it up. She just can't understand me. I'm real quiet, I'm always very nice, and she said I'm nice and I'm easy to get along with, but I just seem so sad all the time, and I said I'm not sad, and uh, I guess to them that's how I seem. That's how my mother probably sees me too. It was interesting. Well, I guess you're right; she hooked me pretty good, and after that I couldn't see anything. I really didn't see that that's what she was doing. I mean, to me it just seemed like if she was wanting me closer, then she should have been nicer and made herself pleasant to live with instead of being so horrible that I just didn't want to be with her at all. And then, after that was over, I didn't feel like I had anything to say to her at all, or my Dad.

THERRY: Isn't that the very thing--those things that you just spoke of--isn't that the very thing that leads everybody into a divorce court?

CORA: Yeah, I could see that.


CORA: Because I really felt like I didn't want to be around her anymore. I mean, talking to you, well, yeah, maybe that's not the best attitude to have. I'm supposed to help them, and I guess I'm not supposed to play their games with them so that I'm supposed to be there to be available.

THERRY: Don't think of it in terms of you're supposed to help them, I mean, you're not an avenging angel, you know.

CORA: No, that's true, and anything I ever try to do they don't take anyway at this point. It just seemed--

THERRY: Remember, the way that we live--the way that we do our job of helping people is to ourselves live an exemplary life, and therefore, by using our own life as an example, it draws other people to you for questions. You don't try to help people by becoming Don Quixote, you know? Go charging after foolish windmills; it just don't work that way. The only thing you do is create more pain.

CORA: Yeah, I didn't know how to respond, that was another thing. When she was saying all this stuff. Most of the time--

THERRY: Again, the best response, if you're going to make one, is truth.

CORA: Well, I kept saying, I understand how you can feel that way-

THERRY: That's not truth. That's dealing with her emotions. That will only make her an individual who is angry more angry.

CORA: Well, it did. So, finally, she said something, and I responded, and I said, do you know what you're doing? And she said, no, what? And I said ah, maybe I shouldn't have said do you know what you're doing because now I'm really aware when I kinda lead people's minds and that was, I guess, leading her mind to ask that. And I said, you have all these expectations of me that are totally unrealistic, and because I'm not living up to them, you're getting furious. And the other thing you're doing is communicating messages to yourself, `cause she came stomping into my room with how I wish she would drop off the face of the earth. And I said you're telling yourself all these communications about what I think that are forming your perceptions, and then you come in here and deal with me thinking that I want you to drop off the end of the earth when that's not accurate at all, but that's the way you're seeing things, and you're making that your reality and your truth and you're acting from that. And it calmed her down temporarily, I mean, what could she say, but she was mad a couple hours later, maybe even ten minutes later. She said, well, Bud, I told your daughter the psychologist how I felt for an hour, and you know what she said, she summed it up in two lines. She said, tell him Cora. So I told him, and ah, he was kind of impressed. He said, well, gee, I'm glad I sent you to school for that, or something.

And ah, my mother meanwhile, jumped in, and we got into it again, and the next day we discussed it again, and she was a little more mellow and I explained it to her again, and then the rest of the week she seemed to get mad at it, and she said, yeah, I share my feelings with you and you give me two lines of psychology about mixed-up messages and expectations. You know what I have now?', and she'd say it to my brother, 'I have mixed-up messages and expectations. That's what I get for sharing my feelings with her.'

THERRY: So the thing you should do at that point is instead of being angry or being hurt, simply say, yeah, ain't ya lucky?

CORA: See, I wasn't mad at that point, but I didn't know how else to respond because then I thought well, maybe I shouldn't have said that because I might have broken her illusion.

THERRY: No, that was fine. It's just a case of now you show her that it doesn't matter what she does, you're not going to be hurt by it. Because, like any child, if you show them often enough that you're not going to get hurt by what they say, they're gonna stop, or they'll go away. So the thing to do is to show her that you're not going to get hurt, you are not going to get hooked, and the best way to say it is, yeah, ain't ya lucky? It's not everybody that has a mixed-up emotion. Usually they're just plain old ordinary screwed up. The key is, as you continue interacting with them, to show them that you do love them, you do care, but you will not allow that caring to be used as a weapon against you.

CORA: Well, I interacted with my Dad the whole time and I seemed to get along real good with him, but I still felt like I had nothing to say to him.

THERRY: That's because it was her time.

CORA: Oh. The thing is I felt I had nothing to say to him, even there. We interacted, and I sat on the beach with him, and I walked around with him, and I drove in his new car with him and listened to music, but the whole time I felt like I had nothing to say to him. We talked a little bit. He starts expounding on this race issue; he sounds like a bonafide Nazi. I mean, I mean not just prejudice, just whole theories on inferiority versus the superiority of all these different races which he has never done before. I mean, maybe he had it in him and just didn't say it, but it's really strange.

THERRY: Maybe he starts out a conversation.

CORA: I don't know, maybe. That's a good point. I mean, I didn't know how to respond to it and I certainly didn't agree with it; I just kinda said uh-huh until he would finish, and ah, we talked some about his life. You know, I mean, I'd ask him other questions and stuff, and I'd talk about the car and talk about small talk, but--

THERRY: Well, in the issue, when he's finished, you could turn around and say, do you really believe all of this garbage or do you, are you just talking because it's a good conversational piece... of course that will or could start a war.

CORA: I have a feeling he really believes it; he did it a number of times.

THERRY: Yeah, so you respond that way--do you really believe all of this garbage, or is it just a conversation piece? Is this what you use to try and get people into conversation? Or is that a reflection of your true feelings? Usually they'll either say, yeah, I really believe that stuff", when in fact they don't, or they'll say," yeah, I think it's true; what do you mean, garbage?" And they'll go off in another tirade. So, if in fact they really believe that, then there's nothing you can do, especially at the age that they're at. The better thing to do is to simply go off to another subject.

CORA: Yeah, well, that's the thing, I mean, when I told him stuff about my life, I could tell he wasn't really interested. He didn't really respond that much, he seemed to drift off--I mean, and I tried the regular subjects: nursing school, and ah-

THERRY: What would he be interested in that stuff for?

CORA: Well, there would be nothing else to talk about, we already did his life.

THERRY: Yeah, but that would be so boring to him, nursing school.

CORA: Well, I finally hit on a subject that seemed to satisfy us all which was family history since I was interested in genagraming, and he did talk a while about that, and that was pretty good, but in general it was just the feeling of not having a lot to say to him that I just didn't know how to deal with very well because most of the time we sat in silence with each other.


CORA: Well, that's what I didn't know; it never was like that before.

THERRY: Again, I'll ask you a question again, and this time don't look at specifics; go into patterns and answer the question. Why? Why did it appear that you guys have nothing to talk about?

CORA: Well, two things come to mind. Either we're so totally isolated from each other that there's nothing to say, or we're comfortable enough with each other that we don't have to talk all the time.

THERRY: That's pretty good; you forgot one. Let's see if you can find it.

CORA: No, nothing else comes up. Let's see, silence. Neither of us knows what to say to the other one?

THERRY: Which would mean why? Protection? Each of you protects one another by using silence. The things that you don't say cannot at a later date be used against you. And the things that you don't say cannot start a war and ruin a moment that is rather nice?

CORA: So would it be self-protection? Or other protection, or both?

THERRY: Protection is what the pattern says, is protection, and it's a whole fabric, a continuum.

CORA: And when I wasn't arguing with my mother I felt the same thing; I didn't feel--I mean we usually have stuff to talk about. The thing that I couldn't understand about the situation with her this time was that previously the past couple years I had a conversation with her a couple years ago about wanting to be friends and wanting to change our relationship to work on a friendship which she agreed to and my father didn't. The thing is she seems to have been acting on it, I mean, for the last couple visits I've gone down there, even when we don't agree a lot on anything, we can still discuss it and share our different viewpoints and not argue about it and have a decent time and get to know each other.

THERRY: Let me ask you a question that's going to answer all of those things, okay? Just because you have a brain, does that mean you're going to use it?


THERRY: Isn't that the same reply to what you're talking about? Isn't it not a fact that all agreements are logical?

CORA: Yeah, okay--

THERRY: What has that got to do, and how are you going to handle the emotions? Throw the logic out the window?

CORA: Yes.

THERRY: Isn't that what happened? Does that negate the original agreement?

CORA: But why now and not before? For the past couple of years we've gotten along so well.

THERRY: What happened to that thing that I told you about that during all very important holidays people will always--

CORA: I've been down there on Christmas before, and Thanksgiving.

THERRY: Fine. Does that mean that she's a pattern where if she acts one way one Christmas that means she's going to act that way all Christmases?

CORA: No, I guess it could be that she's been in more pain this year than other years.

THERRY: And it will get worse as she grows older. As she grows older she's becoming to have to deal in different ways with her mortality. Her fear and her pain and her resentment is going to get more, because, as she begins dealing with her mortality, she begins evaluating her life more, and there is nothing that will bring you irritation and resentment more then when you evaluate your life and discover that you have done without many things because of what you think is somebody else's fault.

CORA: Well, so the next question comes with how to deal with it? Alright, you said ah--

THERRY: Now, whenever you have to ask that question, a bell should go off in your head like Pavlov's dog, and you should think--am I here to try to help in the situation, or am I here to stir the shit and make it stink more. If you want to be a help in the situation, then the first thing you have think of is hey, it is the dark side that is talking.

CORA: And control my emotions, and not give up on--

THERRY: Get `em the hell out of the way; they don't belong there.

CORA: And not give up on them.

THERRY: Right.

CORA: Alright, so how do you respond--another problem I had was responding to what she said. If you--obviously, saying `I understand how you can feel that way' gets them madder.

THERRY: See, there are two things you have to do. There are times, if you're going to help somebody, where you're going to have to play the game. And there are times when you shatter their illusions with truth. Okay?

CORA: Well, I don't know what those times are for either of those things.

THERRY: Well, in time you'll learn them as you grow more. Now, when you decide to play the game, then the best game to play is to up it, up the stakes, but make sure you use only truth.

CORA: How would you do that? You mean make `em hurt more?


CORA: When you say up the stakes, then what do you mean? When you say up the stakes.

THERRY: `Cause if you try to make `em hurt more, that's stupid. Then you're already adding pain to pain. Alright, let's play a scenario, okay?

CORA: Okay.

THERRY: I will play you as you should be when you're playing a game. And you will play your mother.

CORA: Okay.

THERRY: Go ahead.

CORA: Alright. `I'll bet you're a terrible nurse. You're such a cold fish, and you show no emotion that I can't imagine any patient ever getting any care from you whatsoever. I'm really glad that I'm not your patient `cause you're probably just awful.'

THERRY: `Yeah, I suppose you had enough problems trying to be my mother since I got all my things from you.'

CORA: Wouldn't that add pain to her?

THERRY: That's upping the stakes with truth.

CORA: That's not shattering her illusion?

THERRY: No, it's playing the game. She wants to fight, so fight with her. But you must make sure you use only truth. Be very very careful to maintain truth only and don't let your emotions in to it. Keep playing the scenario.

CORA: `You know, you've chosen a difficult lifestyle. I just can't understand how people take more misery on to themselves. And, you know, I bet because you're so cold, that's why you can't have any relationships. All your relationships seem to end. Every time I talk to you you're ending a relationship. You must have ended ten relationships this year.

THERRY: Actually, I think it was twenty-three. But, just think of all the fun I've had.' (laughter)

CORA: Well, when I talk about upping it with truth--well, what I did in that situation was I said you really like adding pain to other people, don't you. Do you really think that you have to tell me something that I already know?

THERRY: Yeah, but see that's not playing the game.

CORA: How not?

THERRY: Playing the game is to if she wants to fight, fight. But do it with honor. Do it so that you don't hurt her. It's not your intentions to hurt her, it's simply an intention to fight with her. And you can't fight with somebody if you stay Madame goody-two-shoes. That's why if you do decide to fight with her, keep it honorable. But make sure that the fight will continue, because it allows her to pour out her venom and her whatever, but in order for you to do it this way, if you're going to play this game, you've got to be very very careful that you don't allow yourself to get hooked because it can turn into a real nasty affair. So, in order to use this role, `cause you're using the role of the devils advocate to help her, but in order to use that role you could very easily become the devil. You have to make sure that very solidly you've got Maat in your heart.

CORA: Well, she said--there was a point when we were first starting--

THERRY: Keep the role.

CORA: Okay.

THERRY: `Cause you'll see that everything my response is absolute total truth, and it's designed to keep the fight going, but it's designed that I won't really hurt her, I just give her back the truth, and that will be painful enough.

CORA: `Your fortune cookie says be sensitive to other feelings, Cora. You could do that once in a while, you know.'

THERRY: `Yeah, but it wouldn't be as much fun though, would it.'

CORA: I said, `it takes two to tango' at that point. Is that the same idea? Or not really, no?

THERRY: No. Because when you say `it takes two to tango', you're attacking her. You're not simply telling the truth, you're attacking her. Your statement was the same thing as saying `you should talk, bitch.' See, you don't want to attack her or her personality. The only thing that you want to do is to state facts as they exactly existed. And that all by itself is going to be much too painful. So that will be sufficient to keep the game going, and it will be sufficient to give her ammunition for thinking later on. Once the fight is over, believe me, she's not going to forget all of these pointed truths that you gave her during the fight.

CORA: `You eat like such a pig. I don't know anyone else who's twenty-six who eats with their fingers.'

THERRY:`I don't know Mom, how much do you weigh?'

CORA: She doesn't eat with her fingers, though.

THERRY: What's that got to do with it?

CORA: How is that using truth?

THERRY: Well, she's saying you eat with a pig.

CORA: Yeah, I eat like a pig.

THERRY: So, that's a connotation of you're a little bit big for your size.

CORA: No, it was a connotation of eating like awful--awful table manners.

THERRY: Okay, but the point is you size-step it. `I don't know, how much do you weigh?' By inverting something like that, by interrupting something like that, it can divert something that could be more disastrous.

CORA: `And you dress so awful. You never wear makeup, you never wear jewelry, you never do anything with yourself. You could look halfway decent if you do something with yourself.'

THERRY: `I don't need to wear makeup and jewelry. I'm beautiful enough the way I am. I'm proud of what God gave me, I'm proud of what you and Dad gave me. I don't need makeup; I'm proud of it, I like it. I'm not a painted lady. I think the two of you did a very good job.' Inside you may be laughing like crazy, but, again, that confuses it.

CORA: Is this the way you're supposed to be in all fights?

THERRY: Yeah. Remember, right now we're playing the role whereby you have chosen to fight with somebody, so when you fight, you've got to fight with honor, not with emotions. You've got to fight simply because it is your intention to allow them an avenue to bring their things out. But you've got to be very very careful that you don't get in emotionally.

CORA: Well, you're not really addressing anything they're saying.

THERRY: No, you're not.

CORA: So, what if they get really frustrated because of that?

THERRY: Try the role.

CORA: `I can't stand talking to you. You haven't addressed one thing I've said. I've sat here and given you ten things that I've been feeling about how you are, and why they bother me, and you just haven't said anything, you've just avoided every thing I've said.'

THERRY: `How have I avoided it?'

CORA: By changing the subject.'

THERRY: `I haven't changed the subject. I've given you a true response to every thing you've said. You may not have liked the response, but I gave it to you just the same. You didn't like the question, you shouldn't have asked the answer.'

CORA: `But you haven't addressed what I've said. You haven't addressed the content of what I said.'

THERRY: `I have too.'

CORA: `I told you something about your table manners and you mentioned a pig. That has nothing to do with table manners.'

THERRY: `I happen to like my table manners. What's wrong with my table manners? I love them. I go out of my way to--hey, I spent sixteen years developing them.'

CORA: `Well I think they're atrocious. Do you do that when you go out too?'

THERRY: `Probably a little bit better than that. Probably a little bit worse. In any case, it's mine. I like it that way. Maybe you like eating with forks. I happen to think that fingers were invented before forks. I'm a traditionalist, what do you want from me?' See, you fight, you deal with the subject, but you stay out of emotions, but you're direct enough so that you hit her with truth. The idea is to disarm her without hurting her. Because the truth that you say is going to be painful enough. Keep playing, I'll give you more examples.

CORA: Um, those were her main themes. She just kinda went back over most of them.

THERRY: Yeah. And she keeps going back simply because you haven't put her at bay on the subjects. `Cause if you notice, the way I responded, there's nothing else you can say.

CORA: That's true.

THERRY: It ends the subject; it in fact does respond to the emotions that she has on it, but it also ends the subject; there's nothing else you can say. The only thing else that she can come up with is `well, I happen to believe...', and in which case you say `that's fine. I accept that that's what you believe. But, just because you believe, you really don't think I'm going to change my mind, do you? You really don't think I'm going to suddenly bow down before you, and suddenly become an angel in your eyes, do you?'

CORA: `Of course I don't think you're going to do anything--'

THERRY: `Then why bother talking anymore on the subject. Except that I know what you like, you know what I like, I know you ain't gonna change to suit me, you know I ain't gonna change to suit you, so let's just agree to disagree, and have a lot of fun along the way.'

CORA: I said that to an extent at one point, and it didn't help.

THERRY: No, because she was interested in fighting.

CORA: Yeah.

THERRY: So, you play the role of fighting. For instance, let's continue the role-playing, and bring up some of the other past things that she's said quite often.

CORA: Um, let's see. `You only love me for my money. It's all you want from me is money.'

THERRY: `Yeah, ain't that awful.'

CORA: `Yes, it is.'

THERRY: `I turn around and leave the house, I don't live with you any more. I hardly ever visit you any more. I hardly ever come anywhere near you, therefore you can't spend that awful dirty money of yours on me. I come maybe once or twice a year, and even then you don't give me no money. I don't ask you for any, and isn't it terrible. I mean, after all, you send me to school. Of course, the fact that parents should send their children--that doesn't count. Ah, you're right. If it wasn't for your money, I wouldn't see you at all. Isn't that terrible?'

CORA: `That's all you do love me for. I believe you'd never see me if it wasn't for my money, and you certainly take that money easy enough over the phone. You're my voice over the telephone; you call and you ask for money. Money for school, money for this, money for that. You don't realize how good you have it. We're the only one's who've ever given you anything, and no one else would ever give you things like us, and don't you ever forget it.'

THERRY: `Yeah, I agree with you.' See what that does.

CORA: Yeah.

THERRY: And you can even add sarcasm to it by saying `yeah, well let's face it, I'm just a little snot.'

CORA: That would stop it even if she's really emotional? I mean, I'm not really that emotional when--

THERRY: Yeah, even if she's emotional, the only thing she's going to do out of that is to become a tirade because you're not taking it seriously. And then when she attacks you about not taking it seriously, then your reply is `well how else do you expect me to behave with such garbage?' Then of course, if she's still furious, she say, `what do you mean, garbage? 'Then the only reply is `hey, if you don't know by now that I love you, to hell with you. And if that doesn't create a chuckle, it will create a tirade like you've never heard. (laughter)

CORA: `And that lifestyle. We don't understand how you could possibly chose that kind of thing for yourself. You're just asking yourself for trouble, and you haven't even been successful at it on top of that. We just can't understand how you can borrow all that much trouble.'

THERRY: `Yeah, but look at how much fun I'm having.'

CORA: `You don't seem like you're having fun to me.'

THERRY: `How would you know? It's not your fun, it's mine.'

CORA: `You seem miserable to us. Can't settle down with one person. Always breaking up with people, can't have relationships.'

THERRY: `Yeah, but look at how much fun I'm having. I'm living life to the fullest. It may not be in the way, the manner, the style that you would, but then you're not me, are you?' Most likely there she'll say `no, and boy am I glad I'm not you.' Then you say, `you know what? So am I.' What would there be if there were two of us in the same place?

CORA: You're good at this.

THERRY: You can be just as good; the only thing that you have to do is keep your emotions out of it, and use just truth.

CORA: Even when I wasn't emotional, I couldn't think of anything to say other then, `I can accept that you feel that way.'

THERRY: Well, one of the ways of getting good at it is to play roles. You have teaching parties where people get together and they play roles. You have a group, and they play roles, and you hear not only what you respond, but what everybody else responds in their roles. You make it a game, and that way, you create little scenarios, you know, like they have charades? Well, it's a form of charades except that it's beat you. And each person plays a role where they bring forth vocally an emotion using subject matter, and each person responds to it.

CORA: Emotionally or any way they want to? What's the goal?

THERRY: No, the goal is to learn to respond so that you're fighting, but you're non-emotional, but the other person don't know that you're non-emotional. The other person has got to perceive that you're in emotions. If your response is so droll that the other person appears to believe that you're not fighting with them, then it's not going to satisfy them. So you learn to play roles. You learn to fight with emotions when in reality there are no emotions. Remember you must be on the level of the individual if you want to communicate to them. Otherwise, if you don't appear to be on their level, you won't communicate to them, they won't deal with you proper. Anything that you try to do with them will be a waste of time. And that's one of the best ways of learning. You play these role games.

CORA: Do mothers and daughters traditionally not get along?

THERRY: It's not just the mother and daughter, it's also the father and the son. And it brings strange feelings to the people involved, because the child will think that they are old enough to know their own minds... but, they still have to live in the house of their childhood. This brings about two possibilities. First, the child tries to be more independent, but the parents will not let go; secondly, Now then, the sad part here is if the relationship is not developed properly between them, then you fall in to the unrequited love type thing. Now, when the relationship is okay, then that love can be recognized and accepted and the parents normally channel the activity into acceptability... and, reluctantly, the parents allows the child more space in which to try out their new roles as they form their ID system. Remember that the parents are not going to like all the roles that the child tries on. That is the source of the generation gap, so to speak.

CORA: The pattern being anger and resentment for not getting what you want?

THERRY: Yeah, among other things. Again, you know, when you deal with that, the sad part about it is, that the trying on of roles are so subtle, that it really is not a case of behavior that deals with it so much as it's a case of coding. Again, it's not really so much a case of the presence or the absence of acceptance, as much as it is a case of the expression or lack of the expression of that love and acceptance. So when the bond is okay, the coding is correct, the love is acknowledged--And the child continues to exchange roles until they discover one that serves their emotional needs.

CORA: How can you tell those things when you're up there on upper levels?

THERRY: You can't.

CORA: Well, then is it best to listen to what the person says even if it's the so-called Dark Side, or is it best to stop the experience?

THERRY: Each individual has to decide that for himself.

CORA: Well, there has to be rules. How do you find out what the rules are in something like that? Or guideposts, or something?

THERRY: Well, see, the problem comes in not everybody is capable of controlling themselves, so, to the degree that you are stable enough to control yourself on all levels, to that degree can you listen to anything. To the degree that you're not stable enough or honest enough, to that degree are you going to fight with the child... By the way, it is a fight that the parents can never win without pulling rank.

CORA: Well, is there any sort of situation where you can validate what's said?

THERRY: Seems to me that if you had looked with reality, that meant that you would have been more honest with yourself and see that the child is going to continue trying on roles. Okay, but see, you have to have honesty built inside of you as an axiom in order to be able to use it. If you have a habit of pulling rank in order to get what you want, then there is no guidepost. The only guidepost is Maat. Maat is the only defense against anything.

CORA: Maat, is that what you're saying? What's--

THERRY: Yeah, Maat, inner truth. If you don't have that, if it's not a habit of yours, if you have a habit of getting emotional and not bothering to check the fact that it is a natural process of forming themselves... and therefore, you don't have that guidepost, you don't have that built-in security.

CORA: So that's why it's better not to rationalize things on this level? Even though I don't have children I've been trying to do that more with other people. It doesn't feel as good `cause I guess that's where cognitive dissonance comes in. `Cause then you have to fight yourself about knowing what you're doing is wrong.

THERRY: Uh-huh. And when you start paying the price for doing what you've done, you'll wish you hadn't. Then you find yourself wishing you didn't have the wisdom, and that's even worse.

CORA: Well, I've gotten over that. I did that for a couple of days. At least I think I've gotten over that. I've decided that it's a lot better to have the wisdom, even though it does definitely make it harder, and you definitely have to take more responsibility, but I guess, I guess power's touched me, so to speak; I can't go back.

THERRY: You were warned.

CORA: You're right. It's funny because I can feel stuff in me; I feel like I'm going away from the regular world, is what I feel like. I know to you that must sound stupid because to you I mean, sitting there watching me playing all my regular earthly games, and still wanting to continue that, you might not see that at all in me, but even though I still want to play certain games, there's still--I still feel like I'm walking away from the road of Earth and all its carnival kind of thing into something else. I mean, I don't really know how to describe it at this point any better than that, but--and the more I meditate, and the more certain things happen, I guess the stronger I get that feeling. I'm more in touch with the power I guess, more frequently... Can I talk at all about the ritual that we did on Christmas?


CORA: Um, gosh, I don't even know where to begin. I know that--well, can you tell me what it meant on other levels? I mean, I read the paper, and what the paper said.

THERRY: What did it say?

CORA: It said that the wine was a symbol of the blood Mendella.

THERRY: Which means what?

CORA: Which is the thing that keeps you on Earth.

THERRY: Right, therefore it was--what is the Blood Mendella?

CORA: The thing that keeps you on Earth; the thing that keeps you in a physical body.

THERRY: That the only thing it is?

CORA: Um, I don't know much more about it.

THERRY: What about the laws? Are you familiar with some of the laws?

CORA: In relation to the Blood Mendella? No, I don't think so.

THERRY: How about the law that says, `All energy must return to its source.'

CORA: Okay, I'm familiar with that.

THERRY: How `bout the law that says, `Whatever power you evoke to place you someplace is that same power that maintains you there.'

CORA: That would be the Blood Mendella? That's what people have evoked to trap themselves in Maya?


CORA: And that's the force that keeps them in Maya.

THERRY: But it's also the force that guards them.

CORA: Against what?

THERRY: Others.

CORA: Other people or--

THERRY: Others all.

CORA: So what did it mean to use that in the ceremony? To drink that?

THERRY: You vow the Alliance of the Rule.

CORA: What does that mean?

THERRY: Well, Brothers of the Chain and Arkasheans, when they descended into Earth, they made a vow that they would maintain greater wisdom and not serve themselves. Instead they would serve the whole, and they made a vow that the number one course of intention was to study law, find out how things work, and use that wisdom to help others. And they made a vow that they would not try to seek power. Consequently, whenever you have a group together, you always have to have a leader. In this particular case, the leader is Pharaoh. So the first section reaffirms or recommits a vow to work under the direction of Pharaoh to help the world.

CORA: And why do you have to have a leader in order to fulfill the things that you said?

THERRY: Let's see if you can answer that. You've been in with people.

CORA: Oh, because if you just have the group together without a leader they'd each want to go their own way? Or they'd each want to--

THERRY: You figure it out.

CORA: Well, that would be the answer that I would get, that each person would want to do things their own way.

THERRY: What happened to NOW?

CORA: You had a struggle for the leadership, and every time the leader changed--

THERRY: I thought you said that as a group gets together, everybody would go their own way.

CORA: If they don't have a leader.

THERRY: What did you mean by go their own way?

CORA: Each person would want to do-fulfill the goals they sought to fulfill in their own way.

THERRY: What happened to NOW? Did that happen to NOW or did they all fight to become leader?

CORA: No, they all fought to become leader. But without a leader--

THERRY: So wasn't that inconsistent with your first statement? Your first statement said that everybody would go their own way.

CORA: If their was no leader, everybody would go their own way.

THERRY: You just told me that everybody fights to be leader. That meant there is no leader.

CORA: Well, eventually one emerged, and then she did things her way, and the group had to follow her way or leave.


CORA: It seems to me that that's what a leader is. I mean, if you have no leader--

THERRY: But if everybody was fighting to be leader, that meant that there was no acknowledged leader.

CORA: At one point that's true, around election time.

THERRY: Oh I see, okay.

CORA: The rest of the time there is a leader, but when elections come up again, yeah, every one who's interested fights to be leader. And if there is no leader at all, then everyone wants to attain the group goals in their own way using their own methods.

THERRY: Okay, even if there's a leader, what happens when the members are not behind their leader?

CORA: Um, the members either choose another leader, or they'd drop from the group, or they would still believe in the goals and try to attain them their way again.

THERRY: So, having a leader is extremely important, right?

CORA: I guess it gives the group direction.

THERRY: That's not my question.

CORA: Yes, it is important.

THERRY: Okay, then, picking the leader is even more important, right?

CORA: Yeah.

THERRY: You have to be careful who the leader is, right? Isn't that equally true in any teacher?

CORA: Yes.

THERRY: Isn't it also equally true that any teacher is also your leader, more or less?

CORA: Yes.

THERRY: Okay. So the first part of that ceremony does just that.

CORA: Acknowledges the leader?


CORA: And those three laws that you said under that leader. Okay, and the second part of the ceremony has to do with the bread.

THERRY: Yeah, that has to do with the Maya itself. See, the first part of that thing was political, and the second part was spiritual. It acknowledges the existence of the law and the weave of Maya.

CORA: The second part?


CORA: How so? What did the bread--

THERRY: What'd it say?

CORA: Well, the bread, I don't remember what the bread represented as much. Oh, I guess the bread just represented Maya itself, right?

THERRY: Um-hum.

CORA: `Cause that was the bread of Earth. And what it said was--

THERRY: Didn't it make an equation? As something is, so thus is.

CORA: Well, I didn't understand all of it. I understood the part we had to say, the part we said was when you put the bread and the blood together, we vowed--

THERRY: Um-um, not the bread and the blood, the bread and the wine.

CORA: The bread and the wine, which symbolized the blood Mendella and Maya, right?

THERRY: Right.

CORA: And the second part we vowed to free man's Ka from Maya.

THERRY: Oh, wasn't it for both? Both of them said that?

CORA: Well, the first one said we'd free men from Earth.

THERRY: Didn't the first one say we'd unite our resolve under Pharaoh to work for the Universe unto time when man is freed from the trap of Maya?

CORA: Well, the wording was a little different.

THERRY: Right, but was that not what it said?

CORA: Yes.

THERRY: And did not the second one say that--again, not using the exact words, `cause I don't use them except on one day per year--did it not say that we would unite using the laws, and dedicate ourselves unto forever until man's Ka is freed from the trap of Earth on all levels?

CORA: Um-hum.

THERRY: So basically the first and the second did exactly the same thing. Reunite the resolve to work for the benefit of the all; not for ourselves. The first one said we'll do it under the leadership of Pharoah, and the second one says that we'll all do it in Maya, understanding what the laws of Maya are, and their traps.

CORA: And what does it mean to dip the bread into the wine? Just the binding of the Blood Mendella into Maya?

THERRY: The same way as it was the binding of man into matter.

CORA: So the descent, basically.

THERRY: The descent, that is correct.

CORA: Was that ceremony also a binding ceremony on the physical of Arkasheans to each other?


CORA: It seemed like it was to me.

THERRY: Um-hum. `Cause it very plainly said that we would unite our resolve under Pharaoh. That means Arkashea becomes one. Not just a group of people with good intentions.

CORA: So that means wherever you live, or whatever your lifestyle, that you're still bound--it's like a binding ceremony. Like you once told me--I don't know if it's the Dark side preset, but there were certain binding ceremonies where you were bound to people on other levels as well as this one karmically by what you do, right?


CORA: And this one was one of those for us, right? For the people that participated in it.


CORA: Because I've felt very different since I've done that, and I've really thought about, I mean, I was honored that I was allowed to participate, and I read it first because I got there way before twelve, and I really thought about whether I should participate in it or not, because I did um--well, I guess it was funny because even though you said I should read that book and maybe I should of the day I was there, but everything you said that day helped me to make a decision on that day of the ceremony plus some of the stuff you had said before about binding and other things because to me I seemed to be aware that that was what was going on even if no one else thought that it was. And, um, I guess on other levels it has other kinds of meanings that you won't discuss, or you would?

THERRY: Won't. If you want to discuss them, you'll have to go on that level.

CORA: So, for here, the representation was the descent and us binding ourselves into matter to help mankind for the whole.

THERRY: Right.

CORA: And the responsibility thereof that goes with that.

THERRY: Right. Such as you can't serve yourself for the sake of self; you may only serve yourself for the sake of others. Now there's a good complication for you.

CORA: Yeah, I don't think I understand that. I don't understand how you do that.

THERRY: It'll come at some future date.

CORA: I mean, I can understand an example of not trapping other people into something I know is a trap.

THERRY: Uh-huh.

CORA: Because that would just be serving myself and bringing somebody else down.

THERRY: Uh-huh. So if you don't do that, don't you serve yourself just the same? Don't you serve your inner Maat?

CORA: Yeah, I guess you do; you don't trap yourself more in other things.

THERRY: So you serve yourself by keeping yourself more free. The same as if you help someone, don't in someway you get help too? You're all in the same boat.

CORA: And if energy that is put out is returned, then I guess you do because serving someone else is serving yourself. Which brings me to the other reason for the private part of this session which is my parents.

THERRY: You have to understand that during Earth holidays, the pain for them will be greatest.

CORA: Why? How does that work? I've noticed that in various situations this year with my friends, you know, different friends, as well as my parents, but I don't understand why.

THERRY: Because during that time of year they become more aware of their wrongs, and their true state of being. And, therefore the pain is greater, and therefore they react according to their nature.

CORA: Well how come some people are happy during the holidays?

THERRY: Because that is their nature. They're in less pain; they are happy, more or less, with their situation. So then, for an important time, they have enough love in them so that they can use that love during the holidays. Some people, love is a rare commodity. They use it as a bargaining chip, and therefore, come holidays, they don't know how to use it for enjoyment, for pleasure, for goodness `cause to them it's still a bargaining chip, and if they can't get what they want, they show the face of anger.

CORA: Is that my parents? Are they using love as a bargaining chip?

THERRY: Your mother is, yes.

CORA: I have a whole lot of anger and resentment in me, and I don't know how to get rid of it, I mean, I know--

THERRY: Well, the first thing you have to do before you can do anything at all is to understand that there are no angels on this planet, so nobody's perfect, nobody. The second thing you have to do is you have to recognize that a person who is in pain is going to lash out the same way as a person who is drowning is going to panic and lash out. So during that time of when they're lashing out, you must not hold anything that they say against them because it is their pain that is talking. If you truly accept that within yourself, then you can see that it is not they who are talking, but it is the Dark side that is talking.

CORA: How is it the Dark side?

THERRY: It is the Dark side that is within them that is talking. And you can't expect nice things from the Dark side all that often.

CORA: Well, I remember you once said a big part of my learning to deal with them was realizing that they didn't do things out of maliciousness; they did `em because they thought that was the best thing to do.

THERRY: Or they did it because they were in pain.

CORA: But still, with their illusion, it was the best thing to do. I mean, I could see a lot of good intentions in a lot of things they did.

THERRY: Therefore why hold it against them?

CORA: Because this time it seemed different. She said things to me that were totally malicious, and had nothing to do with her trying to do--

THERRY: Don't you see it is pain that is talking? For instance, if you see somebody that is so much better than you and you never stand a chance of being able to be that way, aren't you going to resent that person? The mere fact that you see such people and they associate with you, couldn't the Dark side in you simply see that as an affront?

CORA: No, I would always try to be like them, that's why I study with you.

THERRY: But that's you. That's `cause you're not into the Dark side. You remember The Thorn Birds? You notice that was the same thing?

CORA: How so? I'm not getting--

THERRY: She gave all of her money to the priest or to the church not because she wanted the church to benefit, but because she hated the priest and the money would force him to give up the love he had for this lady. Remember?

CORA: Yeah, vaguely. So that he went into being a priest instead of not being a priest.

THERRY: Right. But she did it out of unrequited love.

CORA: Well, I remember the thing about coding love differently.

THERRY: So, isn't it the same thing here? Isn't that what's happening with your parents?

CORA: Well, I had a hard time seeing that. I mean, in the past I could see that it was. That I had an expectation of how they would act--

THERRY: Okay, let's see if we can have you understand it in another way. You ever watch children play?

CORA: Only sometimes. I haven't in a long time.

THERRY: Okay, but remember in the past. What happens when spats break out?

CORA: Well, they usually do stuff to each other. Throw sand in each other's face or push each other.

THERRY: In other words, they do things purposely vindictive in order to ease their pain, right?

CORA: Yeah, in order to get what they want.

THERRY: Isn't that the same thing as your mother did?

CORA: Alright, well, let me ask you something.

THERRY: Yes or no, is that what your mother did?

CORA: I don't know. I was going to give you an example and you could tell me--

THERRY: Does it appear to be?

CORA: No, some of the things don't; that's what seems different this time. I'll give you an example.

THERRY: Alright.

CORA: She told me that--I could see where some of her behavior, yes that was, I mean, I mean she got on my case about everything from my eating habits to different things. I could tell that some of that was, but she said--

THERRY: Cora, you're being inconsistent now. You're trying to tell me that you're so great that you can look into a person's heart and you can see the line that separates between a person walking out of pain as opposed to walking out of darkness. If your telling me that in one conversation and in one spurt of emotion she was telling you a lot of things that you could see and absolutely recognize that they were pain talking. But other things that she said and done in that same set of circumstances were not. It's nice to know that you have grown so much that you can know the difference.

CORA: Well some things seemed a lot more malicious.

THERRY: Of course. Let me ask you a question. It might help you understand the differences in maliciousness. If you're saying something and doing something, and it's not getting a rise out of the other person, what are you going to do?

CORA: Go to something that you think is going to get a rise out of them.

THERRY: Do you think just maybe this is what happened?

CORA: Yeah, all the things that she used to do to me, they didn't get a rise out of me at all. Till she hit one particular spot and I was at her in about two seconds emotionally.

THERRY: So she hooked you.

CORA: Yeah, she did a damn good job.

THERRY: So think of PAC.

CORA: She was acting out of her child the whole time and just got my child?

THERRY: Wasn't that exactly what happened?

CORA: I guess I answered her from the adult most of the time and she didn't like that at all.

THERRY: Right, until she hooked you and then you went to her level.

CORA: Yeah. So wasn't that a malicious intention? Wasn't she intending to hurt me by going to the things that she knew would get a rise out of me?

THERRY: Okay, let me ask you another set of questions. Those little kids that are playing. Are they being intentional?

CORA: No, they're just trying to get what they want.

THERRY: Isn't that what she's doing?

CORA: I don't know, is it? That's what baffled me the whole rest of the trip.

THERRY: Okay, let me ask you a question. What does she want? Now be truthful.

CORA: I think she wants for me to love her. I don't know.

THERRY: Rethink that last thing over again. Is it that she wants you to love her or that she wants you to a greater degree display that you do love her?

CORA: Well, that was her biggest complaint. I guess display to a greater degree that I do love her.

THERRY: Now, since we've established what it is that she wants, now the question: do you think that all this was just her trying to get what she wants?

CORA: How could you get that goal by picking at someone and being nasty to them for the whole time such that you push them away, and then you tell them that you want them to be more affectionate to you; you want them to spend more time with you?

THERRY: Okay, alright. Now ask that same question to those kids that are fighting.

CORA: Well, that's easy, because a lot of times when kids do it, they have--if they push sand in another kid's face--

THERRY: Is it not exactly the same set of rules going on?

CORA: I don't see it, no, I guess I don't see that it is.

THERRY: Then perhaps that's why you can't deal with it as easily because you refuse to see that it is the exact same set of rules.

CORA: Well, how is it? When a little kid wants a shovel he takes a shovel--

THERRY: Does it matter? If a child does something because they want what they want, and an adult does something because they want what they want, and both of them are fighting, both of them will even physically fight as well as mentally and emotionally fight, and in both cases, if it doesn't get a rise, it's going to go to something else, accelerate in order to get a rise, then how can you stand there and truly say that they're not the same?

CORA: I guess I see the difference in my mind--

THERRY: Maybe the only difference is the fact that your emotions is hooked and you're the one that's involved.

CORA: No, I think the difference is when I see kids doing it it just seems more goal directed. If they want B, the things they do go towards B, and getting B. When my mother wants more affection to me, every behavior she did seemed to push me away.

THERRY: Okay, let me see if I can have it understood in another way. A husband and wife are in quarrel.

CORA: Okay.

THERRY: The wife, being scatterbrained, as women usually are, never says what's really on her mind. She fights about everything except what's really on her mind. In her heart, she's pissed off because the husband is seeing another woman, or the husband is not paying enough attention to her, different things like that. Basically, it's because she can't get enough of the person she loves. So how does she normally behave?

CORA: Well, she's angry.

THERRY: So, how does--no, I asked you how she behaved.

CORA: How she--I don't understand.

THERRY: Give me behavior, don't give me emotion.

CORA: How she behaves because--I guess I don't understand the question. You mean, within the situation of them fighting, how does she behave?

THERRY: Yeah. Because she wants love, does she go up to him, and shower him with compliments, and shower him with sexuality, and shower him with all of these things that are in fact going to draw him towards her?

CORA: Well see to me that makes more sense.

THERRY: Stay in reality. What happens in reality?

CORA: Alright, well if she's angry and resentful because she can't get what she wants, then she's going to be nasty, but it's going to drive him away, not bring him closer.

THERRY: Does that change the fact that that's the beauty of reality with women?

CORA: You're saying she wants to be loved more by the person she loves.

THERRY: Uh-huh.

CORA: But she's angry and resentful because she doesn't get that.

THERRY: Therefore...

CORA: So the anger and resentment is going to override a strategy to get more of what she wants?

THERRY: Now, you've asked the question. Now you answer the question according to what you know is actual fact in reality.

CORA: Doesn't make any sense, well, it's starting to make sense to me, but it's hard to--

THERRY: Where is the logic with anybody fighting for love?

CORA: She's not going to have any.

THERRY: Of course not.

CORA: She's feeling anger and resentment then that's going to override anything to get her what she wants so she's going to be angry and resentful and nasty.

THERRY: Exactly.

CORA: Which is just going to push the other person away so she's going to get less of what she wants so she's going to get more angry and resentful.

THERRY: Exactly, and they end up in a divorce court because they end up saying and doing things that they can never forgive one another for.

CORA: And that's exactly what happened to me in Florida with my mother this time.

THERRY: That's the whole point. Can you see that it's exactly the same thing as those little kids, except that with adults they always go too far. They say and do things that they cannot take back.

CORA: That I can't see as far as it being the same with kids because it seems to me that kids are more goal directed to what they want. If they want--

THERRY: Well, so is those ladies that are fighting.

CORA: If a little kid wants more love from someone, they don't kick it, they go up to it and try and get its attention.

THERRY: That's not true.

CORA: Well, maybe I just haven't been around kids very much in the last ten years, which I haven't been.

THERRY: The kids will first go around and they will behave and come right out and try to seek the love from you. Once that love is thought to be rejected, then the kids will behave the same thing as everybody else. A kid will become very vindictive. As a matter of fact, they become problem children.

CORA: Well, I know that if you don't give them attention, then they'll act out to get it, because negative attention is better then no attention at all.

THERRY: Isn't that what's going on with your Mom? This is part of what I'm saying, that if you don't have truth, if you don't have Maat built inside of you, then you never really take the time to look at the laws, you just look at the emotion and what you think ought to be, and you end up deceiving yourself. But if you have Maat within you, then you'll temporarily set the emotions aside, and you'll look at the pattern of law, and that will help you out every single time.

CORA: Well I really tried to do that, but I guess I was missing some of this information because I certainly didn't--to me--

THERRY: Well, I don't believe that you were missing the information because I didn't give you the information. I simply asked you a series of questions and you gave me the information.

CORA: But I saw the pattern a lot clearer from your example then from what she was doing because I guess--

THERRY: But you already had that stuff within you. You knew about the pattern of children, you knew about the pattern of adults, you know about unrequited love, you know about all of these. You've dealt with them. You've dealt with them, plus, what's more, you've even had experience, personal experience with a number of people in exactly exactly the same vein. What about you and Tina?

CORA: Well, what about us? When she--I mean--

THERRY: It's the same pattern.

CORA: How? You mean when we fought all the time?


CORA: We fought all the time about Bill; it didn't seem like there was any unrequited love. She just didn't want me to see anybody else at all.

THERRY: Do not look at specifics; look at patterns. I keep telling you this over and over and over again. Whenever you have to make a decision about something, look at patterns, not specifics. `Cause if you look at specifics, everything is going to be different, or nothing is going to be the same.

CORA: She wanted more of my attention?

THERRY: Isn't that what your mother wants?

CORA: Well I can see it with my mother now that we had this conversation. It didn't seem to me like--

THERRY: The only reason why you couldn't see it before is because you insist upon refusing to look at patterns. You allow yourself to get stuck in specifics because that's where the emotions are attached to.

CORA: Well then how do you handle your own emotions?

THERRY: Ah, you cry a lot, you hurt, but hopefully, if you have Maat within you, it'll pass much quicker. You are human, you're no angel, there aren't any on this planet, so that means you are going to hurt, you are going to cry, but if you have Maat, it'll be a shorter duration. Logic will click in somewhere along the line and say hey, you can't really blame her because it is pain that is talking. It is the Dark side that is crying. And if you truly seize that, then the negative bond between you will be shattered, because it makes about as much sense to be angry with her because she is what she is, as it does for you to be angry at her if she's got a cold.

CORA: Okay, I can see that, and I can maybe start to release the anger, but I'm not willing to interact with her if she's going to do this all the time.

THERRY: Now that's a different story; that's not part of our discussion. That's a different discussion all together. You ready to go into that one?

CORA: Um, let me make sure I understand this. Well, I can see what she did. I'm not sure I can see that it was the same as Tina. You're saying that with me and Tina, Tina wanted more of my attention in the form of monogamy, and I didn't give it to her so she got angry and resentful? Is that the same pattern?

THERRY: You tell me.

CORA: Well that's the only one I can think of because that's what causes most strife was over my wanting to be, still see Bill.

THERRY: So isn't it the same both ways? When somebody wants somebody else, they want to possess her more or less? On various levels on various ways? They want to box them in.

CORA: And when they can't get what they want, they get angry and resentful. Instead of acting in a strategy to get them closer to them, they push them further away.

THERRY: Why not look at that in terms of law. Unrequited love will always bring a problem child.

CORA: What's the problem child?

THERRY: The individual who can't get what they want. Look at most teenagers who have gone awry. Isn't it because of unrequited love?

CORA: I don't know. I can only reference it to myself. And I've had unrequited love and I tried to get the person I want, and when I couldn't, I had a lot of pain, but I didn't get real nasty to `em; I tried to get nicer to `em, and I still couldn't get `em--

THERRY: Oh, I see, and because you couldn't get what you wanted, you didn't go off into drugs, right? You stayed right there and you were the dutiful little daughter who went to school and--

CORA: You're saying that was unrequited love?

THERRY: Wasn't it?

CORA: Yeah, I guess maybe it was.

THERRY: Oh, but it was different with you, though, right?

CORA: No, I didn't think of that as unrequited love. I was thinking in a romantic sense.

THERRY: But wasn't it?

CORA: Yeah, I guess, yeah. I never thought of that as unrequited love, but I guess it was. And I guess that's still part of it. I still wanted them to, to be proud of me, and I wanted their approval, and obviously they didn't give it to me. Only this time it seems like I've made a decision that if they're not going to give it to me, and they're not going to try, then I'm tired of trying too, and to hell with you buddy. And I know that that might not be the best thing to do but that's how I feel right now.

THERRY: Okay, I can accept that that's how you feel. As I said, that part of it is for another conversation.

CORA: Okay, well I guess, I guess I'm ready for it because that's-

THERRY: Okay, now, question: You being the perfect soul that you are, decide that you're going to come down to Earth, and we're going to help this poor unfortunate wretch. Do you expect to come in clean and stay clean?


THERRY: So you're going to get a little dirty along the way, right?

CORA: Probably a lot dirty along the way.

THERRY: Okay, do you expect to come down pure of emotion and stay pure?

CORA: Obviously not, no.

THERRY: So obviously somewhere along the line you're going to hurt and you're going to cry lot. Is that going to be sufficient to stop you from trying to help people?... Got you.

CORA: I think there's a limit to what you have to put up with, what you have to subject yourself to.

THERRY: In other words, you're telling me that, "Okay, I'm going to come down to Earth, and I'm going to help that little bastard. But I'll only go so far; I'll only give him so much of a chance. If he doesn't do what I want within that limit, I'm gone!